FLME Ch65

Fans producing their own food never adhered to logic; the ultimate goal was for the meal to be delicious.

Xie Heyu mirrored a few images. The scale was quite large, and the content was quite wild. Not only were there humanized versions, but also non-human versions, intersex versions, and so on and so forth…

It was one thing to be asked to shoot a humanized version, but the latter few were theoretically impossible to shoot. Yu Wen couldn’t become intersex, nor could he, like the dragon in the text, grow two d*cks… Wait, that wasn’t the point.

The point was that these texts themselves required mirror-flipping to evade Weibo’s censorship. What right did he and Yu Wen have to dare commit crimes against the wind?

Xie Heyu rubbed the tip of his nose, backed out, returned to the trending search homepage, took a screenshot of the #EvilHeroAfterSales# trending topic, and sent it to Yu Wen.

Yu Wen had already slipped back into the room and was boredly flipping through the books on Xie Heyu’s bookshelf.

Teacher Xie’s bookshelf consisted mostly of professional books and lacked any real entertainment value. Yu Wen had grabbed two basic electronics books, intending to expand his knowledge base, when Xie Heyu’s message arrived.

He took a look and only then realized that the three videos filmed by the company had already been posted online. Looking at the discussion volume on the trending search, it must have been fermenting since the morning.

What was rare was that Xie Jiamao, who used to get incredibly excited whenever he saw a trending search, hadn’t come to hype him up in a long time. Starlight Media, this makeshift troupe, seemed to have seen the world now; a small trending search was just a routine meal to them.

Aside from Chu Han occasionally discussing his new role in the group, and Xi Su sometimes demanding promotional red envelopes when his new works aired, the Starlight Media core group chat was entirely peaceful. It was as if everyone had already seen great winds and waves, and no longer felt joy over external gains or sorrow over personal losses.

Yu Wen chuckled, put down the professional book, and opened the trending searches.

Xie Heyu scrolled through his phone, resisting his old man’s relentless bombardment.

“…Not interested. You egged me on once during my senior year of high school, and I’m a sophomore in college now.”

Xie Jialin choked. “You didn’t go back then.”

Xie Heyu: “You said back then that this was your ‘lifelong wish,’ and if it couldn’t be realized, you’d die with your eyes open.”

Xie Jialin: “Yeah.”

Xie Heyu shot him a cool glance. “Auntie said you got cancer and didn’t have long to live, so I agreed.”

Xie Jialin: “…”

His sister really dared to make things up.

He sheepishly rubbed the back of his head. “No wonder you suddenly changed your mind…”

Although his family’s expectations were very high, Xie Heyu did not like engaging in arts-related work. It wasn’t that he hadn’t been sent to learn music and painting, but he quickly realized that his rationality reigned supreme, lacking any romantic cells. A person without empathy and creativity was not suited to survive in these industries.

Xie Heyu had a clear understanding of himself. No matter how his family coaxed and deceived him, he never relented.

Later, Xie Jialin took an unconventional approach, hoping he would go on an idol survival show. After all, an idol’s ultimate destination was becoming an actor; it was all the same.

The only time Xie Heyu’s attitude softened was during his senior year of high school. Fooled by his aunt, he learned a bit of dance and vocal music. Before he even got on the show, he discovered that all the talk about not having long to live was just his second aunt talking nonsense—his dad was perfectly healthy.

“Give up. Our old Xie family doesn’t have this kind of talent,” Xie Heyu said coldly. “Should I enter the entertainment industry to perform as a stinky-faced God of War for the audience? Even you think I’m boring; wouldn’t the audience?”

Xie Jialin thought about it, and indeed it was true.

A kid like Xiao Yu could thrive in the entertainment industry—he had audience affinity and acted well. If this silent gourd went on camera, only his face would be worth looking at…

“Fine.” Xie Jialin sighed regretfully and said, “Are you hungry? Want some late-night snacks?”

Xie Heyu shook his head and had just stood up to go upstairs.

Xie Jialin: “I’m a little hungry.”

Xie Heyu: “…”

Psycho.

Xie Jialin’s cooking skills were mediocre. When he wanted to eat well and the head chef wasn’t around, he would harass Xie Heyu.

With his hands in his pockets, Xie Heyu took one step onto the stairs, his back spelling out the word ‘speechless’. After standing silently for a moment, he still stepped back and turned into the kitchen. “What do you want to eat?”

Xie Jialin rubbed his hands together. “Steamed sea bass, braised pork ribs, garlic eggplant…”

Xie Heyu threw the apron out at him.

Xie Jialin immediately changed his tune: “Noodles.”

There was no more movement from the kitchen.

Xie Jialin said tentatively, “Precious son… add an egg, please. Thanks, love you.”

After entering the kitchen, Xie Heyu wanted to message Yu Wen to ask if he was hungry and wanted a late-night snack. When he opened WeChat, he found a new message.

Yu Wen: [Xie-bala, you’re very famous.]

Xie Heyu: […?]

Yu Wen was scrolling through trending searches. Seeing his question mark, he replied with a beaming smile: [Everyone is looking for you, Teacher Xie. You’re genuinely famous now, you need to watch your words and deeds in the future.]

Xie Heyu ignored this and asked: [Are you hungry? I’m making late-night snacks, what do you want to eat?]

Yu Wen: [Late-night snack? Not too hungry, I’ll just have a yogurt bowl. But Uncle is downstairs, how are you going to bring it up?]

Xie Heyu: [I’ll just say it’s for the kitten.]

…Whose kitten eats a yogurt bowl?

Yu Wen: [Alright, the kitten is waiting for you, kiss_kiss.jpg]

Looking at the message, Xie Heyu felt a slight tickle in his heart, as if he had been scratched by a little paw. He suddenly felt that this kind of sneaking around was quite interesting. Because someone was home, the kitten would stay hidden in his room, not daring to come out, but would send him messages asking for kisses.

It was like keeping a beauty hidden in a golden house.

His gaze lowered, and the corners of his lips curled up secretly.

After scrolling through the trending comments, Yu Wen followed the internet trail to Xie Heyu’s private account.

The most recent Weibo post was from half a year ago—an automated birthday post. Below it were about a dozen very active accounts. They were all private alternate accounts, but their tones were very familiar.

Some were wishing him a happy birthday, some were cheering, some pretended to be veteran fans, and some pretended to be new fans. Their identities were all sorts of diverse and different, and they were putting on quite an enthusiastic performance.

[Brother, I’m Tian Tian, you might not remember me. Grievedly poking fingers together.jpg. I even helped change your diapers when you were little…]

[Brother, I’m Ruan Ruan, I hugged you when you were little, do you remember? Shyly covering face.jpg]

[Contact info XXX… Come to X City to find Auntie, I’ll treat you to all the best food and drinks.]

The funniest part was a group photo in the comment section. It must have been taken on his birthday. There was a cake on the table, and Xie Heyu wore a birthday crown on his head.

A dozen or so people were cosplaying little monsters, striking wild, chaotic poses. None of their faces were visible in the photo. And Xie Heyu, surrounded right in the center… was cosplaying the human host of Ultraman, without a helmet.

This whole crazy family knew to cover their faces while acting insane, but Xie Heyu was the only one fully exposed in the shot, contributing to a unique piece of social death.

He stood rigidly and properly in the middle. It was hard to tell if he was indifferent or just used to it. His hands were clasped together making a wish, giving off a vibe of outward calmness, but with the composure of someone who was actually wishing to blow up the entire world.

Yu Wen laughed like a maniac the moment he saw this photo, instantly understanding how Xie Heyu’s mountain-steady temperament was forged.

Scrolling further down the comment section, Yu Wen harvested over a dozen photos.

There were daily photos, goofy ones, and normal handsome ones. Xie Heyu had an excellent physique; just standing casually made it look like a magazine shoot. Moreover, he never had any expression. No matter how goofy the pose, his expression never broke. Honestly speaking, it had quite a high-fashion feel.

Yu Wen scrolled all the way down, saving photos frantically. There was one in particular that he really liked: in the picture, Xie Heyu was still wearing a blue and white school uniform, holding a bass guitar. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, revealing forearms that, although lean, already showed faint muscular contours.

It was still that expressionless face, though he looked even colder back then than he did now, exuding a distant aura that said “strangers keep away.” His right hand hovered over the strings, looking as if he was just about to strum. The blood vessels and veins on the back of his cold-white hand were very striking.

Yu Wen suddenly understood why hand-connoisseurs existed in this world.

It was too appealing.

He saved the entire series of photos, still feeling unsatisfied, when he remembered seeing a photo album on the bookshelf earlier.

Yu Wen: [Can I look at your photo album? Photo.jpg]

Xie Heyu was probably busy and didn’t reply immediately. Yu Wen stretched lazily, feeling a bit sleepy, and sent: [I’m going to sit on your bed to look.]

He knew some people were clean freaks and didn’t like others sitting on their bed without changing clothes, so he dug out two items of clothing from Xie Heyu’s wardrobe and said: [Is it okay if I wear these two pieces of clothing on the bed?]

A moment later, Xie Heyu replied: [Sleepy?]

Xie Heyu: [Sure. The wardrobe against the wall contains unworn clothes. The shelf next to the sink has disposable toiletries. Underwear is in the walk-in closet, second drawer from the left.]

Xie Heyu: [The unopened underwear is new. But new ones haven’t been washed, so they’re dirty. I suggest you wear mine.]

Yu Wen: “…”

He associated this with some unhealthy thoughts, stood up, paced around in circles, pulled his hair, and his face started burning again.

He hesitated and replied: [That’s not very appropriate, is it… Our relationship hasn’t reached that level yet.]

Xie Heyu was cooking, so his replies were a bit slow.

A short while later, he said: [Hm? Sorry, I didn’t think it through. I didn’t mean it in that way, it was just a well-intentioned suggestion.]

In the kitchen, Xie Heyu watched the “typing…” indicator in the chat box. Who knows what Teacher Xiao Yu was thinking; it took him forever to just squeeze out six dots.

[…]

Holding the spatula, he let out a laugh.

Uh-huh… He had found the ultimate move to deal with Teacher Xiao Yu.

Yu Wen did not take his advice. Instead, he opened the new underwear, washed it, and dried it before wearing it.

To think he didn’t even mention there was a dryer in the room. Teacher Xie was definitely playing mind games again just now.

After taking a shower, Yu Wen leaned against the headboard and slowly flipped through the photo album.

Teacher Xie didn’t look like someone who liked taking selfies, but there were actually quite a lot of photos. His family must have loved taking pictures of him.

There were many photos covering various age stages. One was from his cub period, maybe five or six years old, with chubby cheeks, his lips pursed tightly, crying with a face full of stubbornness.

So cute, Yu Wen’s heart melted.

Flipping further back, he started keeping a straight face for photos, looking like someone owed him millions. Unlike when he was a child—he loved to smile back then, especially in his cub period, showing a row of small, glutinous-rice-like teeth, which was extremely cute.

In middle school, his fashion sense began to form. He liked simple clothes with good lines that made him look sharp, and he slowly started pairing them with small accessories.

The further back, the clearer the cool guy image became. It was no longer a deliberately kept straight face, but a natural, inherent indifference.

It was hard to imagine that beneath this cold face was an incredibly rare good temper.

Halfway through, Xie Heyu told him that there were three sets of photo albums in total; the other two sets were in the drawer, and he could get them himself if he wanted to look.

Yu Wen got out of bed at lightspeed, gleefully carried the photo albums back, and opened the second set.

Bedtime reading, yay!

He spent about half an hour briefly finishing the three photo albums. Just as he was preparing to read them a second time, Xie Heyu walked in carrying a yogurt bowl.

“Have you brushed your teeth?” Probably seeing that he was already in bed and afraid of disturbing his sleepiness, Xie Heyu kept his voice very soft.

But Yu Wen was actually very energetic. Having passed the point of sleepiness, he would only get more and more energetic.

“No.” He shook his head, got out of bed, glanced cautiously out the door, and said, “Did you say you were bringing food for the kitten? Did Uncle believe it?”

Xie Heyu: “Don’t know, don’t worry about it.”

There was no need to care about whether it was true or false; lying was nothing more than not wanting to say certain things. He often brushed Xie Jialin off like this. The fact that his old man was easily brushed off didn’t mean his old man’s brain was bad; it just meant he respected his wishes.

Downstairs, Xie Jialin was sitting on the sofa, slurping noodles while watching TV.

Seeing Xie Heyu come down, he cast him a sidelong glance, swallowed his food, and said, “This cat of yours is quite interesting. Seems almost human…”

Xie Heyu simply crossed his arms, stood by the stairs, and stared at him coldly, his face screaming: This is all your fault.

Xie Jialin smacked his lips and asked tentatively, “Or else… I could go out and play cards for a bit?”

“Then I would truly be an unfilial son.” Xie Heyu snorted coldly, carrying the yogurt bowl Yu Wen had licked clean into the kitchen to wash it.

Xie Jialin slurped his noodles for a while, but still couldn’t hold back and asked, “I only have one question. Does this cat’s surname happen to be Yu?”

“…” The water was running in the kitchen. A moment later, the water sound stopped. Xie Heyu wiped his hands, came out of the kitchen, and said casually, “Mm.”

Holding his bowl, Xie Jialin shot up to his feet instantly!

He said decisively, “I’m going out to play cards. Don’t speak, don’t ask me to stay, this is my personal wish. I have ants crawling all over my body; if I don’t play cards tonight, I will die.”

Xie Heyu watched him rush out the door. But a moment later, the door opened again. He placed his empty bowl on the shoe cabinet and said, “I’m going to play cards, you wash the bowl, that’s not asking too much, is it?”

His old man even made a very trendy finger heart at him, flashing a magical smile that said, You know, I know, we all know.

“Forget it, Old Man.” Xie Heyu remained standing where he was, saying lazily, “We’re not lacking this one night.”

He took the bowl from the shoe cabinet into the kitchen, suddenly turned around thoughtfully, and leaned against the kitchen doorway. “I feel like I need to make a change…”

“Hm?” Xie Jialin suddenly became vigilant. “You don’t want to start a business, do you?”

It was normal to want to rise up and strive after getting into a relationship, but starting a business… to put it bluntly, without starting a business, the family’s assets could feed three generations. If he started a business, the Xie family might actually go bankrupt.

Their family had Xie Jiamao “striving”; that was enough.

“…What are you thinking?” Xie Heyu said helplessly. “I meant to say, I remember you have another property nearby…”

Xie Jialin: “…This is your way of striving?”

Pausing for two seconds, he said benevolently, “Good boy. Starting a business is wrong, mooching off your parents is right. You’re doing very well, Dad supports you. Pick a house, we’ll process the transfer of ownership immediately.”

Xie Heyu: “…”

He just wanted to say that he wanted to move to a different place. These properties weren’t far apart anyway. After all, now that he was dating, if this kind of awkward situation happened again next time, it wouldn’t be very appropriate.

Xie Jialin: “…I’ll give them all to you, live there with peace of mind. Things are fine the way they are, no need to change. What about money? Do you want money? Dating is very expensive, Dad will give you some shares…”

Xie Heyu felt dizzy. He washed the bowl and went upstairs, covering his ears.

Yu Wen had turned off the ceiling light, leaving only two soft bedside lamps on. He was lying on his stomach on the bed, resting his chin on his hands, looking at photos.

He even kicked his feet up in the air, his two calves swinging back and forth, looking exceptionally cozy.

Xie Heyu had originally been worried he would feel uncomfortable, but seeing this, he was relieved. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he stroked Yu Wen’s freshly washed, fluffy hair.

“You’re back.” Yu Wen grabbed his hand, his tone of voice slow and leisurely.

Xie Heyu guessed he was sleepy and asked, “Why aren’t you sleeping?”

“I’m waiting for you.”

Yu Wen rolled over, sat up in bed, placed the open photo album in front of him, pointed to the blue fish-shaped mark on the clothes in the photo, and asked, “Did you hand-draw this? Where have you seen this pattern?”

Xie Heyu glanced at the photo album.

It was his middle school uniform. On the hem of the uniform, there was a dark blue twin-fish pattern. The lines were simple, and it was obvious it was hand-drawn.

It had been so long, he really couldn’t remember why he had drawn this pattern.

“…I don’t remember, but I’ve definitely seen it. I probably thought it looked nice, so I drew it on my clothes.”

“Is that so?” Yu Wen said doubtfully.

Back when Xie Heyu helped him move his computer, he had also mentioned that it looked familiar, but Yu Wen hadn’t paid it any mind at the time. Later, he searched online and was certain that this pattern didn’t exist here, nor was it any brand’s logo.

Moreover, the one on his computer was black. If Xie Heyu hadn’t seen it before, how did he know the original version was blue?

Yu Wen had some speculations in his heart. Transmigrating into a book was indeed a mysterious thing, but since there was him, perhaps there could be a second or a third person.

He decided to test the waters.

“In your book… who is the protagonist?”

Xie Heyu’s dark pupils stared at him, not speaking.

Yu Wen grew nervous.

No way, is it really as he guessed… If it is true, Teacher Xie must have transmigrated into this body’s soul, after all, there are so many photos serving as proof…

“Sorry,” Xie Heyu said. “This time I really can’t follow your train of thought.”

Yu Wen: “…”

Bro, you were silent for a good while, just trying to decipher my train of thought?

Yu Wen wasn’t ready to give up. “In the book, who is Chu Han… paired up with?”

Xie Heyu: “…Which book?”

Yu Wen still didn’t give up, changing his methods of asking, but Xie Heyu remained completely clueless to every question. He finally gave up.

“It’s nothing,” he said listlessly. “I just suddenly went crazy.”

Xie Heyu rubbed his head comfortingly and said, “I’m going to wash up. If you’re sleepy, go to sleep first.”

Yu Wen nodded despondently.

He muttered, “I thought we could chat about over there…”

He actually missed home quite a bit.

Xie Heyu heard this mutter. Gripping the bathroom door handle, his movements paused.