FLME Ch100

Chapter 100: Extra Episode of “Love Reality Show” (Part 3)

The heart-to-heart session was swiftly concluded with Chu Han’s sudden move. The guests were assigned their rooms and headed back to wash up and sleep.

The next morning, the production team sent them a fresh new task.

Yu Wen, still sleepy, yawned while reading the task card in his hand: “One day at the Oceanarium… Couples playing hide and seek…”

The day’s activity was set at a newly built, unique Oceanarium. The rules designed by the production team were that one partner would arrive at the Oceanarium first to change outfits and hide, and if the other partner could find them within half an hour, they would win and earn a special dinner for two that night.

For Yu Wen, this posed no challenge; it was just a fun little couple’s game. But when paired with Xie Heyu, he had no confidence.

Teacher Xie seemed to have radar installed on him. Last year, during his birthday celebration, when he slipped out to check in at a street spot, Xie Heyu could usually find him in less than an hour. The fastest record was 16 minutes, so it was easy to imagine how disadvantaged he was in this game of hide and seek.

Yu Wen thought about it for a while, then went downstairs to discuss with Xie Heyu.

Xie Heyu had gotten up early and was making coffee with a hand grinder, waiting for it to brew. While waiting, he took a few eggs from the fridge to prepare breakfast.

Yu Wen shuffled over in his slippers, hugged him from behind, and rubbed his cheek against the soft fabric of his back.

Xie Heyu was used to this, casually reaching back to ruffle Yu Wen’s messy hair, continuing his task.

After resting in Xie Heyu’s arms for a while, Yu Wen remembered his business.

“We’re playing hide and seek later…”

Xie Heyu: “Hmm?”

The punishment for losing was likely the ‘nickname’ chosen last night. Yu Wen wasn’t the type to be overly dramatic, but he was older than Xie Heyu. If he had to call him ‘brother’ for 48 hours in front of the camera, he’d probably be ridiculed by netizens.

In comparison, Xie Heyu, being younger, was more suited for this punishment. Plus, they often used such nicknames privately, so they were already accustomed to it.

Yu Wen thought of teaming up with Xie Heyu to lose on purpose, but he couldn’t make it too obvious in front of the cameras. After deliberating, he shot Xie Heyu a meaningful glance.

Xie Heyu: “Is your eye twitching?”

Yu Wen: “Tsk.”

Yu Wen, undeterred, continued to make exaggerated gestures at Xie Heyu.

Xie Heyu stayed silent, staring at him.

After a long moment, just when Yu Wen thought his eyelids were really about to twitch, Xie Heyu put down his cup, turned around, and faced him.

Yu Wen looked at him expectantly.

Xie Heyu turned around, leaned on the counter, and gave Yu Wen a wink—awkward, stiff, but definitely a wink.

Confused, but respectful.

Yu Wen: “…”

Xie Heyu: “Aren’t you the one flirting with me?”

Yu Wen, frustrated, said, “I saw you secretly laughing! Don’t say you didn’t understand!”

Xie Heyu’s mouth curled up into a smile, then he quickly lowered his head. His throat couldn’t suppress a few chuckles.

Yu Wen knew that meant Xie Heyu wasn’t going to cooperate, and he got angry, grinding his teeth, “If you won’t, you won’t… Anyway, I won’t lose to you easily. We’ll see.”

He snatched Xie Heyu’s freshly brewed coffee, leaving behind an unwilling posture in front of the cameras scattered around the living room.

By 9 AM, the guests slowly started waking up and heading downstairs.

Yu Wen had already finished breakfast and was out in the yard enjoying the breeze. Chu Han, holding a cup of soy milk, came out to find him. The two squeezed onto the same swing and began rocking back and forth.

“Last night, my boss called me and reminded me to watch my words,” Chu Han muttered, sipping his soy milk. “Did you tell on me?”

Yu Wen: “Do you still need to tell on anyone? The footage from last night will definitely make it to trending, and your boss will find out.”

Chu Han: “They’ll probably mute it. It shouldn’t air.”

Yu Wen: “…You knew they’d mute it and still said it?”

Chu Han looked sleepy, leaning against the swing’s rope, and said, “You guys asked, so I couldn’t lie.”

Yu Wen: “Sometimes, it’s okay to not be so honest. Wait and see, soon everyone will know you’re two-faced and a big flirt.”

Xie Jiamao, of course, had no idea what had happened last night. Since Chu Han rarely appeared on variety shows, he called to remind him. Yu Wen had also received his message to cue Chu Han more, so he wouldn’t end up with no lines when the show aired.

Yu Wen thought, don’t worry, boss, there’s no shortage of camera time for him, and with the trending topic, we’ve got it covered.

After breakfast, the production team arranged for them to depart early.

The Oceanarium wasn’t far from the seaside cottage where they were staying, about a 20-minute drive. The PD explained the rules to them on the bus, and then they were separated to different entrances.

Yu Wen was at entrance D. After checking his equipment and putting on the microphone, he walked straight in.

The Oceanarium had four levels, with the top two focused on education. The space was large, and the venue was sparsely populated. Whether it was just the opening or the production team had rented the entire place, there were only a few visitors.

The low number of visitors didn’t work in Yu Wen’s favor, but the large space was to his advantage. Running through the entire venue would take about half an hour, meaning Xie Heyu and the others had no chance to double back. They either spotted him right away, or they lost.

Feeling a bit reassured, Yu Wen got distracted by the fascinating marine life. He took the escalator down, passing by jellyfish and schools of sardines, and then ran into Chu Han in front of the penguin exhibit.

Chu Han was gazing at the waddling penguins behind the glass, looking completely melted by their cuteness.

Yu Wen stood next to him, watching.

After a while, Chu Han said, “Can I take one home as a pet?”

The PD, following them with a camera, couldn’t help but laugh, and the camera zoomed in on Yu Wen.

Just as they thought Yu Wen would try to stop Chu Han, he leaned against the glass and seriously pointed at an adorable emperor penguin, saying, “I want this one.”

Chu Han looked at it and said, “I don’t mind, any one will do.”

Yu Wen: “Let’s make a move.”

Chu Han: “Make a move for what?”

Yu Wen: “Steal a penguin.”

Chu Han thought for a moment, then said seriously, “That’s not legal, right?”

Yu Wen said, “How is it illegal? If you let the Oceanarium call it, and it doesn’t respond, that means I’m its dad.”

Chu Han: “…That makes sense.”

The production team was stunned, worried they might be up to something, so they quickly sent a staff member over.

“Actually, we have a lot of penguin-themed merchandise over there. If you want, you can try your luck with the claw machines. If you’re lucky, you might win a penguin doll, no need for any risky business. Take a cute penguin home instead.”

There were a few claw machines placed inside the Oceanarium, and Yu Wen had passed by them earlier. Indeed, there were many lifelike marine creature dolls, including penguin machines and even a giant shark machine.

Reluctantly, Yu Wen and Chu Han were led by the staff to the penguin booth.

A staff member dressed in a huge penguin mascot costume pointed at a nearby sign and explained the rules.

There were two large claw machines with penguin dolls inside—various types of penguins. At first glance, they all looked the same, but upon closer inspection, they were clearly designed to scale down the penguins in proportion.

Yu Wen was looking for his favorite emperor penguin. He asked eagerly, “Where’s my son?”

The penguin mascot pointed to the nearby booth, where the word “exchange items” stood out.

That was the life-sized doll of his penguin.

The rule was simple: If you caught any three penguin dolls, you could exchange them for one of the dolls at the booth.

Without hesitation, Yu Wen took out his phone to exchange for tokens, saying, “I’m coming to save you, son.”

After him, Chu Han found his favorite little penguin at the nearby machine and eagerly exchanged for a basket of tokens.

…Of course, it was a failure!

He didn’t catch a single one.

With time running out, the PD reminded them to go change and hide. The others would be arriving soon, and if they didn’t get ready, they’d be found easily.

Chu Han, still lost in the cuteness of the little penguins, said, “I won’t hide. If they find me, they find me. At least there’s seafood for dinner.”

Yu Wen kept stuffing tokens into the machine and reminded him, “Then you’ll have to call President Feng ‘Master’ for 48 hours.”

“…” Chu Han thought it might be necessary to hide, so he stood up, scanning the area. He pointed at a penguin mascot and asked, “Can I borrow this to wear?”

Yu Wen: “Do you think President Feng is stupid? This spot is so obvious. Even if he doesn’t recognize you, he’ll lift it up to look.”

Chu Han thought for a moment and agreed, “You’re right. This is a battle for dignity; we can’t be careless.” He bid farewell to the little penguin in the display, saying, “I’ll come back for you in half an hour. Wait for me.”

Yu Wen also had to go. He already had an idea for his disguise. Passing by a penguin mascot, he got an idea. Since Xie Heyu was familiar with his every move, he decided to cover up as much of his appearance as possible—just like the penguin mascot, hidden entirely.

The best approach was to appear infrequently.

He had just passed by an exhibition hall where there was a mermaid show. The divers helping out seemed to fit the theme perfectly.

After failing a few more attempts to catch the penguins, Yu Wen, worried someone else might take the emperor penguin doll he wanted, asked the PD for a waterproof marker. He wrote on the display board next to the mascot: “I gave birth to it, don’t steal it, thank you.”

To make sure his message was clear, he drew an arrow and added a few small love hearts.

After finishing, he jumped off the counter and rushed to the mermaid exhibition hall.

The mermaid show had just started when Yu Wen arrived. The staff, swinging their red fish tails, were playing with the fish, and many tourists were gathered in front of the glass, marveling at the performance.

Yu Wen was held for five minutes.

PD: “Mr. Yu, the diving equipment is ready, and the instructor is waiting for you backstage…”

“Wait, wait,” Yu Wen’s eyes lit up. “I’m not going to be a diver anymore… I want to perform as this.”

The PD thought he was talking about the mermaid and immediately responded, “Mermaids require long-term professional training for safety. Sorry, the production team can’t let you do that…”

“No,” Yu Wen pointed. “I want to perform as this.”

The PD followed his gaze.

He saw a monster being attacked by Ultraman…

PD: “?”

Was there this part in the mermaid performance?

Xie Heyu walked into the venue.

The crowd was sparse, and the venue was unusually quiet. Occasionally, some tourists passed by, curiously observing them.

The four guests were scattered at different entrances, and Xie Heyu was accompanied by only one PD. He walked slowly, not seeming in a rush to find anyone. He occasionally looked around without speaking. The PD, unsure of his intentions, was worried about the footage and asked, “Teacher Xie, where do you think Teacher Yu might be hiding?”

“Mm?” Xie Heyu turned his head in surprise, as if realizing the PD’s presence for the first time, then chuckled, “I don’t know.”

PD: “I heard online that you’re very good at tracking Teacher Yu. You can usually pinpoint his location within an hour, so is it because you’re unfamiliar with the Oceanarium’s layout?”

Xie Heyu recognized the sarcasm and replied, “I can guess where he might go, but if he’s purposely hiding, I may not be able to find him.”

PD: “Hahaha.”

The conversation ended there.

Xie Heyu truly didn’t like talking and didn’t seek attention. If he had any thoughts, he kept them to himself, never engaging with the cameras.

This made his post-production quite difficult, so the director had to fill in his actions through extensive post-interviews. As his accompanying PD, it would be ideal to capture his thoughts in real time.

Xie Heyu made a couple of rounds, then headed for the escalator.

The PD, holding the camera, followed closely, trying to capture his every micro-expression in 360 degrees.

After being filmed up close for the sixth time, Xie Heyu slightly stepped back and politely said, “I don’t have any thoughts right now.”

PD: “Then what are you doing?”

Xie Heyu: “Just browsing.”

The PD couldn’t help but raise the timer, reminding him, “You have 30 minutes.”

Xie Heyu glanced at the screen showing that five minutes had passed and nodded indifferently.

…And then there was no further action.

He continued walking.

The following PD’s heart was a bit tight.

He felt that separating Xie Heyu and Yu Wen was the director’s biggest mistake. The two of them appeared in the same shot perfectly—one talkative, the other reserved; one breaking things, the other cleaning up the mess, and they even gave the audience some sweet moments.

After they were split up, the filming difficulty on both sides increased dramatically.

He almost wanted to lock this couple together and throw the key into the sea.

Complaints aside, he still had to shoot. When he saw Xie Heyu stop in front of a claw machine, the PD hurried over with the camera.

This was a booth selling penguin dolls.

At first, the PD thought Xie Heyu had been drawn to the giant penguin dolls, as it seemed like someone could be hiding inside. However, Xie Heyu only gave a cursory glance.

The penguin mascot pointed to a sign nearby, explaining the rules.

Xie Heyu glanced at it briefly, took out his phone, and scanned the QR code to exchange for tokens.

PD: “…Teacher Xie, are you going to play the claw machine?”

Xie Heyu: “Hmm.”

The PD was about to ask why when the camera captured the five prizes displayed on a board. One of them had a line of small text on the side, which wasn’t very noticeable due to the backlighting and the chaotic patterns on the sign.

The PD adjusted the focus and zoomed in on the text.

—”I gave birth to it, don’t steal, thank you.”

…If Xie Heyu hadn’t stopped here, this message would’ve just seemed like a child’s prank.

But as soon as Xie Heyu stopped, the message immediately looked like something written by Yu Wen.

Not only was there the text, but there was also the imagery.

The camera froze on the sign for a moment before switching to a shot of Xie Heyu’s face.

He was looking down, inserting tokens into the claw machine, the LED lights inside the machine highlighting his focused expression as he raised and lowered his eyebrows.

The PD regretted not capturing the moment when Xie Heyu and Yu Wen’s handwriting might have met.

This couple… really feels destined to be together.

So sweet.

Xie Heyu spent fifteen minutes catching three dolls and exchanged them for the penguin that “Yu Wen gave birth to.”

If you’re wondering how he knew it was Yu Wen’s handwriting… it’s simple: he recognized Yu Wen’s handwriting.

After exchanging for the life-sized penguin doll that was about half his height, Xie Heyu continued with the interrupted task.

At this point, there were only ten minutes left on the countdown.

He wasn’t in a hurry because he didn’t want to win. But others didn’t share the same calm attitude.

Just as he was about to head to the lowest floor, he suddenly heard a loudspeaker echoing through the venue. He could vaguely make out the voice of a certain CEO:

“Chu Han—Chu Han—your boyfriend is looking for you. If you hear this, please come to the second-floor service desk to meet him; Chu Han, Chu Han, your boyfriend is looking for you—”

“…”

Both Xie Heyu and the PD turned to look, and they saw Feng Chengzhou sitting on a patrol car, holding a megaphone. The patrol car circled the entire second floor, its voice echoing around.

As he passed by Xie Heyu, Feng Chengzhou stuck his head out and asked, “Have you seen my Chu Han?”

Xie Heyu shook his head.

Feng Chengzhou left with a disappointed look.

The PD was stunned and said, “If I were Teacher Chu, I definitely wouldn’t come out…”

So embarrassing.

Xie Heyu agreed silently.

Feng Chengzhou wasn’t stupid, though. After three minutes passed, and Chu Han still hadn’t come out, he quickly changed his strategy.

By the time Xie Heyu reached the ground floor, the patrol car had already made its way down, its loudspeaker now announcing: “Missing person alert—missing person alert, lover Chu Han, wearing a camel-colored coat, as beautiful as a flower… currently missing. Those who provide accurate information will be generously rewarded; those who escort him to the patrol car will be greatly thanked.”

Xie Heyu: “…”

The patrol car passed by, and once again, Feng Chengzhou stuck his head out, asking, “Have you seen my Chu Han?”

Xie Heyu shook his head again.

Feng Chengzhou left with yet another disappointed look.

But truth be told—

Xie Heyu glanced at his watch.

If only there had been more time, this trick could’ve actually worked.

He didn’t pay attention to Feng Chengzhou anymore and planned to go check out the penguin exhibition. The penguin dolls were all different, and they must have been custom-made in proportion. Given Yu Wen’s obsession, he must have seen the real penguins.

As he passed the mermaid performance area, two students were discussing something: “I’m not mistaken, it’s definitely Ultraman…” “I heard this part was specially written, with the little mermaid being captured by a monster, and Ultraman comes out to fight the monster…” “Crazy…”

Xie Heyu unconsciously glanced at the performance area.

With the audience eagerly waiting, the little monster appeared.

It was wearing a custom diving suit, which made the monster appear slimmer than the one on TV. Its limbs were thin, with only a long tail on its back, and it wore a headpiece that obscured its face, making the whole body tightly wrapped.

Tourists around pulled out their phones to take photos.

Having seen so many ridiculous storylines, this one was definitely the dumbest.

The staff member playing the little monster was fully committed. After grabbing the mermaid’s tail, he placed his hands on his hips and laughed arrogantly, looking every bit like a villain celebrating his victory.

Then, Ultraman appeared and began “punching and kicking” at the little monster.

The little monster fled in embarrassment, with several rounds of chasing. Ultimately, under Ultraman’s powerful laser attack, the monster tilted its neck and dramatically fell to the ground, “dying” on the spot…

Xie Heyu stood still and paused.

He turned his face slightly and let out a small laugh.

The performance ended, and the tourists gradually dispersed.

Yu Wen, flapping his flippers, sneaked into a corner to hide.

The director had told him that he couldn’t leave the camera’s sight before the countdown finished. Whether he went to the exhibit or stayed in the pool, he couldn’t retreat to the backstage, or else Xie Heyu would never find him.

Yu Wen had just entered the water. With plenty of oxygen and a few artificial rocks in the pool, he could hide for a few minutes without any issues.

The little monster slithered into a corner, its tail swaying with the water.

Yu Wen glanced over his shoulder and noticed that Xie Heyu was still standing nearby, watching him with a faint smile.

Yu Wen thought, “No way, he can recognize me like this?”

Panicked, he swam as if with the other staff, but then turned back to check. He noticed Xie Heyu was holding a half-human-sized doll, and when he looked closer—his son!

Xie Heyu had brought the penguin baby!

Yu Wen was initially thrilled, but then he calmed down. He silently reminded himself: victory is in sight. Patience, patience—don’t let anything distract you, don’t slip up…

After swimming for a while, Yu Wen realized Xie Heyu didn’t seem to be getting any closer.

His position was neither too far nor too near, and the tourists had all dispersed. Xie Heyu could have approached to look, but he didn’t make a move.

Yu Wen wasn’t sure what he was looking at.

The PD asked, “Teacher Xie, what are you looking at?”

Xie Heyu: “The monster.”

The PD, puzzled, shifted the camera.

The little monster was hiding behind a rock, and not all the divers had left, so he didn’t seem out of place. But the PD noticed something familiar in the sneaky way the little monster peered out from behind the rock…

The PD asked directly, “Is this Teacher Yu?”

Xie Heyu just smiled without speaking.

The PD reminded him, “There are only two minutes left.”

Xie Heyu walked over and politely tapped on the glass, waving to the little monster hiding behind the rock.

The little monster pointed at itself.

Xie Heyu nodded.

The little monster waved.

Xie Heyu continued tapping the glass, gesturing again, repeating the same interaction.

Yu Wen felt like he was never going to stop.

After two or three rounds, the little monster reluctantly came out from behind the rock. As soon as Xie Heyu opened his mouth, Yu Wen raised his hand to stop him, then wrote on the glass: “No signature.”

“No signature…” Xie Heyu muttered, repeating the words.

To his surprise, the little monster understood. He gave a thumbs-up, nodded, and crossed his arms, looking very dignified, like a big shot with an attitude.

The PD reminded, “There are 40 seconds left.”

Yu Wen glanced at the timer, feeling a surge of confidence. Victory was within reach.

He knew Xie Heyu had already recognized him, or else he wouldn’t have gone out of his way to call him over. It seemed like they had decided to team up, and Yu Wen felt touched.

“30 seconds,” the PD said, “Teacher Xie, have you found Teacher Yu?”

Yu Wen could more or less read the PD’s lips, but since Xie Heyu had already teamed up with him, he certainly wouldn’t—

Xie Heyu: “I found him.”

Yu Wen: “?”

His eyes widened in surprise, fearing that Xie Heyu was about to betray him at the last minute. He quickly made a few hand gestures, then pointed at his neck, giving Xie Heyu a fierce look, signaling: Don’t say anything, or I’ll take you out.

PD: “Where?”

Xie Heyu didn’t answer.

The PD thought to himself, sometimes these two really play some interesting games with each other.

He could already imagine how happy the CP fans would be after this episode aired.

“10 seconds left,” the PD said. He could tell that Xie Heyu didn’t intend to win, but there still had to be a sense of ceremony, “8, 7, 6…”

“The countdown is over, the game is a failure.”

“Here,” just as the words left his mouth, Xie Heyu lightly tapped Yu Wen’s forehead through the glass.

At the same time, other guests announced the end of their time.

Feng Chengzhou’s sorrowful voice echoed through the loudspeakers on the ground floor: “Chu Han, we lost—”

Author’s note:

Feng Chengzhou: “Chu Han, I’m an idiot, but I love you (CEO holding a rose).”