FLME Ch29

Yu Wen had blown up in popularity, and he had done so completely bafflingly.

For several consecutive days, trending topics about him lingered on the hot searches. That “Daily Question” had even evolved from a fan Super Topic into a fixture of the platform, where industry bigwigs—never ones to pass up a good spectacle—took turns leaving comments, practically roasting him over the spit of his own hype.

His drama hadn’t even aired yet, but he was already a familiar face to over half the entertainment circle.

At first, Yu Wen tried to play dead and avoid it all. Eventually, he summoned his courage and crept back onto Weibo, weeping silent tears over his skyrocketing follower count as he painstakingly followed back all the big shots who had followed him.

[Teacher Yu, any drama today?]

Facing such prompts now, he had learned to remain cool and collected, replying: [None.]

[Alrighty then.]

This sort of bizarre, nonsensical exchange played out once every single day.

His fans showed no mercy when it came to watching him suffer:

[Hahahaha Teacher Yu talks so little, does he have something on his mind?]

[Let our Xiao Yu off the hook! He’s about to shatter!]

[Teacher Yu, you’re genuinely famous now… forgot the middle part… you must watch your words and conduct closely!]

Over the phone, Xie Jiamao counted on his fingers, popping champagne at halftime as was his custom. “You’re already a tier-three… no, tier-two! You definitely count as a tier-two artist now! Our Xiao Yu really is the greatest!”

After hanging up, Yu Wen gazed at the sunset on the horizon, a wisp of worldly weariness in his heart.

His dream of being an obscure tier-three nobody was drifting further and further away.

It had been over half a month since wrap-up on the set of Legend of the Immortal Sect, and the wrap banquet had finally arrived.

Arriving at the hotel destination, the moment he stepped out of the car, Jian Heng stood before him with an air of pious reverence, holding a birthday cake crown he had scrounged up from who-knew-where.

Yu Wen gave the hem of his sleeve a crisp flick, rustling it like a royal cape, and condescended magnanimously, “Presumably, this is the welcoming gift prepared for This King. Granted. Crown me.”

Brimming with utmost sanctity and awe, Jian Heng placed the crown onto his head.

Yu Wen said, “Xiao Jianzi, prepare the imperial carriage.”

Xiao Jianzi said, “As you command!”

Crossing the lobby, Jian Heng snatched a warm, damp hand towel from a waiter’s tray, shook it open, and draped it over Yu Wen’s shoulder to serve as a cape.

Yu Wen said, “A bit scalding.”

Jian Heng piped up immediately, “It is the burning, boiling fervor of Xiao Jianzi’s heart!”

Thus, Yu Wen inclined his head tolerantly, permitting that humble white damp towel to rest upon his noble shoulder.

Holding his head high like an emperor on a western inspection tour, he strode into the private dining room.

Thinking the bit was about wrapped up, he was just about to pull the towel off—it really was weirdly hot—when the door was abruptly flung open from within. Zhu Xinyi set off a confetti popper and announced with beaming enthusiasm, “Welcome, Teacher Yu, to inspect and guide our production! Everyone applaud!”

Thunderous applause erupted. Every credited character from the drama was gathered right here.

Yu Wen had no choice but to drape the towel back over his shoulder. Lips curving into a reserved, subtle smile, he held his chin high and gave a sweeping wave of dismissal to every pair of eyes fixed on him. “Dispense with ceremony, dispense with ceremony.”

Holding the cake in a corner, the director laughed until he was rocking back and forth.

Rolling a sheet of paper into a makeshift megaphone, Jian Heng stood atop a chair and proclaimed loudly, “Today, we gather here in joyous celebration because our best friend, Teacher Yu Wen, shot to stardom overnight during the half-month we had our heads down filming! Thanks to him, our Legend of the Immortal Sect has received unbelievable exposure, and—what’s more—has successfully been upgraded from a B-tier small production into an A+ major production!”

Even though filming had already wrapped, the promotional placement between a B-tier and an A+ title was an entirely different universe. Setting down the cake, the director freed both hands specifically to clap, applauding until his palms turned red.

Yu Wen was slightly taken aback. “Is that so?”

Jian Heng: “You betcha! The director said the price offered by the streaming platform is two to three times what it was before.”

Yu Wen adopted a solemn expression. “Give me a dividend cut, thank you.”

Director: “We will! Everyone gets a cut!”

Once that initial burst of wild madness settled, everyone shared a hearty laugh, calmed down, and watched as the director took up the knife to slice the cake.

Jian Heng lamented, “I’ve gingerly maintained good ties with every single friend, hoping that one day a brother would carry me to glory. And you, Teacher Yu—you truly didn’t disappoint my expectations. Not only did you jump tiers yourself, you dragged your bro right up the ladder with you!”

Jian Heng thumped his chest hard twice.

Yu Wen thumped his own chest in return, throwing him a wink. “We’re brothers, no need for thanks.”

Midway through the feast, everyone was chatting idly, and Jian Heng asked about his upcoming schedule.

Yu Wen mused, “Resting for a few days… then in about a week, I think I have to film a new variety show.”

The notice sheet for Battle Royale had already arrived.

Xie Jiamao had actually managed to negotiate a regular spot on a national-level variety show. No matter how much Yu Wen thought about it, he couldn’t figure out how, ultimately chalking it up to the saying that fortune favors the foolish.

Temporarily casting aside their daily physique maintenance, Jian Heng chewed on his cake, mumbling, “Yeah, I heard the director say our drama will probably lock down an air date by next month. If the reception is good, they might even gather us all up to shoot a little group-trip vlog or variety spin-off…”

“Really?” Yu Wen said with surprise. “The director dares to dream that big?”

Jian Heng: “Isn’t it because you pump him full of chicken blood every day!”

Yu Wen shrugged innocently.

“Still,” Jian Heng added, “I might not be able to make it. I’m about to go shoot a dating show—fully closed off, they won’t even let us carry phones.”

He looked rather regretful. “Xiao Yu, next time you see me, it’ll be over a month from now.”

Yu Wen offered a perfunctory farewell in response. Legend of the Immortal Sect was a textbook low-tier flop drama; everyone’s status was roughly on the same level, and fooling around together on set had forged bonds far deeper than those between ordinary colleagues. Having finally wrapped filming and ended the job, they were all genuinely reluctant to part.

The dinner went well into the dead of night. With alcohol rushing to their heads, everyone went off the deep end in their own special way. Zhu Xinyi wrapped her arms around the actress playing Third Shijie, howling in tears, “Third Shijie! Don’t go! How am I supposed to live without you!”

In the end, the director instructed those who were still sober to escort everyone home one by one.

Yu Wen hadn’t drunk much, so by the next morning, he was once again a refreshed, energetic Xiao Yu.

Hopping onto his little electric scooter, he sped off toward the company—the boss had said he was filming a vlog for them today.

Now that the dust had settled, Director Gao had finally returned from the back of beyond. Coincidentally, none of the company’s members had work today, so the boss insisted on filming a vlog to grandly introduce Starlight Media, laying the groundwork for making the company bigger and stronger in the future.

By the time Yu Wen arrived, Chu Han was already there, sitting in the reception lounge curiously studying the decor. He praised, “Your company’s interior design actually has quite a bit of taste.”

The furnishings were minimalist. The subtle metallic sheen on a feature wall was the finishing touch, injecting a sense of technology and futurism into what would have been an ordinary reception lounge.

Mounted on the wall was the company logo, its lettering lean and fluid, featuring a daring, clashing color palette.

Yu Wen scanned it, thinking to himself: How could it not look good? Teacher Xie painted that wall himself, and it holds Xiao Yu’s honest labor too.

“I painted that side,” he claimed shamelessly, pointing at the silver-gray accent wall.

While they were talking, Xi Su stepped out of the elevator and walked in from the corridor. With headphones clamped over his blue head, he wasn’t paying attention and walked straight into the clear glass door, grimacing in pain.

Witnessing this scene, Yu Wen thought: …Can our Starlight Media really become bigger and stronger?

Whether it had a future at all was a pressing question.

Who knew what strings the boss had pulled, but he had actually established one-way contact with Feng Chengzhou and cleared up the whole misunderstanding. One night, Xi Su had out of nowhere texted him in the middle of the night: [Hey man, I don’t have to go home and sell barbecue anymore. I can still survive in the entertainment circle.]

Yu Wen hadn’t replied at the time, so Xi Su just soliloquized in the chat box: [Still, I’ve decided to invest in a barbecue joint. Just in case I can’t survive one day, at least I won’t starve.]

Xi Su: [I’ll still give you a twenty percent discount. To my best friend, finger heart.jpg.]

Director Gao arrived late. Seeing him gave Yu Wen a jolt, and he exclaimed loudly, “Director Gao, did you go into the mountains to live as a monkey?”

In less than half a month, Gao Kaiyu’s hair had grown a lot—messy and shaggy, needing only a bird to qualify as a nest. Stubble of short, dark beard was sprouting, his eyes were dull, and thick bags hung beneath them, looking entirely as if his vital essence had been sucked dry.

He let out a yawn. “Rushing the schedule… haven’t had a proper night’s sleep in half a month.”

Xie Jiamao grumbled that he detracted from the company’s image and forbade him from appearing on camera. Gao Kaiyu was only too happy for the peace and quiet; he rolled over to the guest sofa, pulled a blanket from a nearby cabinet, and peacefully dozed off.

Xie Jiamao exchanged two words with Yu Wen, and the moment he turned around, faint snores were already drifting from the sofa.

“…”

Turning his head back, he said helplessly, “Let’s broadcast from another room.”

The six pillars of the company ought to have been gathered in one place right now. Unfortunately, one was still on the road driving over, while another was fast asleep next door.

Xie Jiamao lined the three of them up in a neat row and explained, “I posted a teaser last night, but netizens said they wanted a livestream, so we temporarily switched it to a stream… Teacher Xi, do you have any problems with that?”

Hearing that it was a livestream, Xi Su shot up out of his seat.

He clawed at his bird’s nest of hair, which rivaled Gao Kaiyu’s. “I’m not wearing makeup.”

Yu Wen thought to himself that Xi Su truly was survival-show-debut material—he really understood image management. Tilting his face up, Xiao Yu said, “I’m not wearing makeup either.”

Xi Su glanced at him. “Your skin is as tender as a peeled boiled egg, what the hell do you need makeup for?”

Having received a compliment out of nowhere, Yu Wen acted coy. “You flatter me, you flatter me…”

Chu Han poked his head over. “Weren’t we supposed to shoot a vlog earlier? Wouldn’t you still have to be on camera?”

“That’s different,” Xi Su brooded for a moment, then stated with absolute gravity: “A vlog can be photoshopped frame by frame.”

Yu Wen: “…”

Judging by how unabashed this kid looked, he had clearly done this many times before.

Xie Jiamao said, “Our company doesn’t have that much baggage. Ugly is ugly; even if you’re ugly, I can still pull resources for you.”

“Awesome.” Xi Su couldn’t help giving him a thumbs-up, his gaze shifting to one of sheer adoration for the boss.

Watching the clock, Xie Jiamao went live right on time.

The fill lights and high-definition camera were already in position. A smartphone was placed in front of Yu Wen so they could easily monitor the bullet screen.

The second the stream started, the barrage scrolled in neat, unified formation:

[Greetings, Melon King!]

[Greetings, Melon King!]

[Greetings, Melon King!]

……

Yu Wen: “…”

He had tried his best to accept it, but seeing this joke face-to-face still felt a little… chuunibyou.

Some memes you could never outlive; some embarrassments stayed with you for life. An unknown great once said that as long as his heart remained as steadfast as a boulder, he would not be easily swayed…

“Pfft—”

That boulder-like state of mind cracked instantly. Yu Wen mechanically turned his head, casting an inquiring gaze at Xi Su.

Why are you laughing?

Chu Han was clamping down hard on the corners of his lips, desperately recalling tragic memories from his past. The comments were closer to him and packed a bigger punch; it took monumental effort to choke down the laughter in his throat.

“Pfft, I just think the comments are pretty fun…” Unable to fathom his sense of shame, Xi Su even lifted the screen right up to his face. “Look, they’re calling for you.”

Yu Wen closed his eyes in resignation.

Opening them again, he had serenely embraced his new identity. “My beloved subjects, rise.”

[Thank you, Melon King!]

[Thank you, Melon King!]

[Thank you, Melon King!]

……

[Where’s the crown prince? Did the crown prince not come today?]

Xie Jiamao stepped outside to take a call, leaving the stream to their free improvisation. Yu Wen could only resign himself to replying, “The crown prince won’t be coming today. Today is just a little company team-building event, so only company members are showing their faces.”

After answering, he discreetly swept his gaze over Chu Han. To his surprise, Chu Han’s expression was placid; for once, mentioning this person didn’t prompt any annoyance.

…In truth, Chu Han was merely holding in his laughter so hard his face had gone completely numb.

[It still takes the crown prince sitting beside you; how can the Melon King not have his Left and Right Protectors by his side?]

“Huh?” Yu Wen quickly pulled out his phone again and searched for info regarding the “Left and Right Protectors.” An image popped up—the exact moment Yu Wen had called out “Rise” in the livestream. Netizens had photoshopped a crown onto his head, while Feng Chengzhou and Chu Han, who happened to be staring solemnly at the camera, were edited into ancient imperial guard robes.

The caption read: The Melon King is here.

The two flanked beside him were bestowed the distinguished titles of Left Protector and Right Protector.

After viewing the meme, Yu Wen fell silent.

He gave the netizens a subtle, discreet reminder: “The crown prince… is the next chairman of Huiteng Group. Having him serve as my protector, isn’t that a bit…”

[Audacious! How dare he refuse?! For the Melon King to take a liking to him is his blessing!]

[A petty Huiteng crown prince, how could he possibly compare to our Melon King?]

[Your Majesty! I do not covet your melon patches, I only covet your beauty—might this humble maiden take residence in the Central Palace?!]

[If you’re taking the Central Palace, then I’ll be the Imperial Noble Consort.]

[If you’re the Imperial Noble Consort, I’ll be a Noble Consort.]

[If you’re a Noble Consort, I want to be Consort Nian.]

[Then I’ll be Zhen Huan.]

[This concubine of the Guwalgiya clan accuses Consort Xi of adultery and throwing the inner palace into chaos, a crime deserving of death!]

Xi Su’s reaction was a beat slow. Having just finished searching for the Protector meme, he craned his neck and leaned in. “Is there a Front Protector or a Rear Protector? I want to be one.”

This stumped the netizens for a moment.

[This concubine of the Guwalgiya clan… bestows upon you the title of General Who Shakes the Realm!]

Xi Su cupped his hands solemnly. “My thanks to Empress Guwalgiya!”

[Speaking of which, when did Xi Su join the same company as Xiao Yu?]

[Wait, now that you mention it, Chu Han is with this company too?]

[Company team-building… just who is in your company?]

The topic finally swung back on track, and Yu Wen breathed a sigh of relief.

Assuming the grand duty of a host, he proudly introduced them to the netizens: “This is Xi Su, debuted from a survival show, handsome with top-tier visuals. When he acts in idol dramas in the future, he’ll be a bona fide traffic star… And this is Chu Han, with plenty of works under his belt whom everyone should recognize. He officially signed with our company recently. Although Starlight Media is a ragtag… a newly founded company, a powerhouse actor like Teacher Chu can shine bright wherever he goes.”

Finishing the introductions, he wore a proud face and gave a seal clap. “Everyone, welcome them!”

[Welcome!]

[One visual idol, one powerhouse actor—what about you?]

Yu Wen spouted off without missing a beat, “I’m a freeloader.”

“My goal is to wait for these two friends to explode in popularity, and then be sugar-daddied by them.”

[Pfft hahahahaha]

[Haven’t seen you in a few days, and the Melon King’s ability to spout nonsense has leveled up.]

[Do not belittle yourself! You are the Melon King!]

[How about this: become a paparazzi in the future, document the beautiful moments around you anytime and anywhere, and then use that dirt to extort major entertainment agencies.]

Yu Wen subconsciously turned his head to look at Xi Su. Xi Su happened to see this comment too; meeting his gaze, he sat upright with a slightly guilty conscience.

Just as Yu Wen was about to drop a few subtle hints to keep him from committing illegal offenses, he caught sight of Xie Heyu carrying several plastic bags through the glass doors outside.

“Oh look, our Teacher Xie is here,” Xi Su said, trying to divert his attention.

Xie Heyu pushed the door open. The girlish wind chimes hung by the boss jangled softly. The cool guy was dressed simply today—black tee, long trousers, with a subtle lip stud at the corner of his mouth that looked ridiculously stylish.

Xie Heyu swept his gaze over them and mouthed: Have you had breakfast?

Before Yu Wen could speak, Xi Su deciphered the mouth movements and shot his hand high into the air. “Teacher Xie, me! I haven’t eaten.”

He slept late with an irregular schedule and hadn’t had time for breakfast on his way over.

The breakfast was originally bought for the two middle-aged men; neither Xie Jiamao nor Gao Kaiyu had the fine habit of eating breakfast. Kind-hearted Teacher Xie, worried that the others hadn’t eaten either, had brought enough for five people.

The bullet screen was drawn in by that call of “Teacher Xie.”

[Who’s that? An assistant?]

[What delicious food did you bring? Show us!]

[You guys haven’t had breakfast yet? Perfect, I haven’t either—let’s have a hearty mukbang!]

Xie Heyu gestured toward Xi Su to come grab it.

This time, Blue Hair couldn’t read the signs. “Teacher Xie, what is there? Any steamed buns? Soy milk? Egg rolls? …Bring them over, please, thank you.”

Xie Heyu: “…”

The chat was getting hungry just listening to him.

[I decree that you must eat all of those on camera for me today. Damn it, if you don’t have them, go downstairs and buy them yourself!]

[So craving, so craving, so craving—]

Yu Wen whispered quietly into Chu Han’s ear, “Did you eat breakfast?”

Chu Han shook his head.

So Yu Wen waved toward Xie Heyu, flashing a bracket smile. “Over here—”

Xie Heyu left two buns and two cups of soy milk for the dead-to-the-world Gao Kaiyu and the nowhere-to-be-found Xie Jiamao, packing the rest into a large bag and carrying it all over.

A hand with distinct, slender knuckles reached into the frame. Pale, cool-toned skin, faint veins visible on the forearm, with a silver pinky ring resting on his little finger.

[…This hand…]

[I’ve seen hands like this in certain “action films,” though they weren’t as pretty as this one.]

[Looks like it could poke really deep (not really)]

[More than deep, look at the muscle—bet he’s got the strength of an ox and plays wild tricks.]

[New here, is this a wholesome livestream?]

[Sisters, rein it in! The mod is here! Don’t get hauled away in cuffs!]

Yu Wen had his head down rustling through the breakfast, completely missing the chat’s momentary derailment.

From outside the frame, Xie Heyu slid over a glass lunchbox packed with sliced avocado sandwiches.

He mouthed: Eat this.

Yu Wen wasn’t actually hungry, but the sandwiches in the container looked thoroughly appetizing.

He looked up and met Xie Heyu’s eyes, confirming they were meant for him.

Taking a bite, the flavors of avocado and egg burst across his tongue with a rich texture, and Yu Wen’s eyes lit up instantly.

Leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets, Xie Heyu gave a faint nod. The circular lip stud reflected a cool glint.

Yu Wen silently mouthed to him: You put cucumbers in it?

Xie Heyu nodded, emphasizing: Fresh ones.

Yu Wen: I could tell.

He smiled, pure and charming, the teardrop mole beneath his eye vividly captivating.

After a moment, he couldn’t resist raising a hand to discreetly tap the corner of his own lip.

With a ding from his phone, Xie Heyu sent over a product link—a clip-on lip cuff.

Yu Wen was thrilled. A lip cuff was great; he could wear a clip-on too.

While he was daydreaming about how cool and handsome he’d look wearing the lip cuff, the bullet screen had already drifted eight hundred miles off course thanks to his continuous string of little gestures.

[We seem to have turned into thin air…]

[What does tapping the lips mean? Wants a kiss?]

[Xiao Yu, you’re not allowed to kiss other boys, do you hear me!]

[Wuwuwuwu Xiao Yu’s smile is so sweet, damn it, why isn’t my wife in my bed! Who stole him away!]

[Fuck, I’m almost tempted to ship you two.]

[Hahahaha can someone decipher his mouth movements?]

[Who could possibly read that?]

[Then how on earth are the two of them holding a conversation?]

[…Fuck.]

[Pondering it closely, looks like food—I’ll take a bite.]

Xi Su had a steamed bun in one hand and soy milk in the other, eating happily. Happening to catch this part, he tilted his head, bobbing it back and forth as he scrutinized Xie Heyu and Yu Wen.

When Yu Wen turned around, he saw him swaying about like an ADHD child.

“Xi Su,” Yu Wen said, “if your body itches, go take a shower.”

Xi Su, who was right in the middle of feasting on drama: “…”