FLME Ch18: Audio

Except for the person themselves, the drawing results would only be shown to the camera.

Yu Wen silently observed everyone’s expressions. After the others displayed their results and returned to their seats, they exchanged meaningful looks.

Unable to deduce anything from facial expressions for now, he decided to wait until tomorrow to see.

In the second round of drawing, Chu Han became the lucky one to prepare breakfast the next morning.

He smiled helplessly, unfolding the note in his hand, which had a hastily written “1.”

Drawing the smallest number meant cooking, an established tradition in “Mountain Courtyard.”

The group dispersed in twos and threes. When Yu Wen got up, Xi Su helped him and casually said, “Brother Chu Han, let me help you tomorrow morning.”

Yu Wen thought the evening was over, but hearing this, his alarm bells started ringing.

Sticking to the best plan for breaking up a CP—starving the CP fans. He decided to be a third wheel.

“Need any help? I can too.” He turned his head sincerely towards Chu Han and said, “Saving a life is more meritorious than building a seven-tiered pagoda. And dragging me up the mountain from below, you, my friend, are simply a living Bodhisattva.”

Chu Han looked at his trembling legs and said, “I’m afraid you’ll die in front of the stove.”

Yu Wen: “Do not curse me.”

Chu Han’s legs were also sore, and he bent down to rub his ankle, “It’s just making breakfast; there’s no need for so many people… but this path is really tough.”

Yu Wen caught the keyword, “This path? Wasn’t this the one you used before?”

“Yeah.” Chu Han straightened up and came over to support him, “Let’s go; our room is next door. Xi Su, get some rest early… There’s another path that’s a bit shorter, but it also takes about half an hour, and it’s not as steep. But that path has a lot of mosquitoes at night. One bite, and you get a big bump. Previous guests complained about this, so this time the production team had you take it this way.”

With that, he pursed his lips and joked, “You should be happy you didn’t get bitten.”

Yu Wen knew there were many mosquitoes on the mountain and had seen previous guests covered in bumps.

But compared to the despair of this path, he’d rather be bitten by mosquitoes.

“So touching,” he said expressionlessly, “I’m so warm, I’m third-degree burned.”

The next day, Yu Wen got up early.

The grouping letter was hung on the door, designated by the production team. Yu Wen was paired with Song Chenglei. When he went downstairs to check, as expected, Chu Han was paired with Xi Su.

In front of the kitchen, there was a small flight of stairs. Yu Wen hopped in like a little zombie. Chu Han was beating eggs, and Xi Su was assisting him. They didn’t talk much, but the atmosphere was warm—at least to outsiders, it seemed so.

Chu Han wasn’t good at hiding his emotions in real life, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t. After all, he was a rare talent as an actor, and after just two or three episodes, he had become enlightened. Since he couldn’t avoid it for the time being, it was better to maintain basic social interactions rather than remain stiff, so at least the audience wouldn’t catch him making mistakes.

Yu Wen poured a glass of warm water and licked it like a cat with the tip of his tongue, squinting his eyes and sighing: The entertainment industry is really complicated.

He wondered how he had been doing so well before, realizing it was because he hadn’t been near the undercurrents. As soon as he started interacting with the main characters, there were suddenly a lot more things to think about.

Yu Wen decided to finish this job and then withdraw, not wanting to get involved in the protagonists’ disputes and entanglements.

Chu Han and Xi Su were making breakfast in harmony. Yu Wen leaned silently against the kitchen door, quietly observing the two for about ten minutes.

“Brother Xi Su, are you the ‘Gold Thief’?” he suddenly asked, startling both of them.

Chu Han almost threw the spatula, saying irritably, “Are you a ghost? You walk without making a sound.”

Yu Wen felt wronged, “I hopped in. Your oil pan covered up my footsteps.”

His face vividly displayed four words: “Is this my fault too?”

Chu Han knew he was an actor but had never seen him act. At this moment, he thought he could definitely become an outstanding film emperor, simply because his expressiveness was too strong.

“Why does Teacher Yu think that?” Xi Su wiped his hands and countered, “I’m a good person, really. Compared to that, Teacher Yu is more suspicious. Why were you standing here just now? Could your method of stealing be related to us?”

Yu Wen raised his hand and shook his finger.

“Wrong~” he expressed his disagreement in a roundabout way, “I was observing. Brother Xi Su just ‘unintentionally’ touched Teacher Chu’s arm three times, handed him things six times, and took things from him eight times. If direct and indirect contact both count as physical contact, then you’ve already stolen seventeen units of points from Teacher Chu.”

Xi Su was stunned and smiled, “It’s not that easy. There’s only one point of contact, right?”

Yu Wen: “How do you know? Have you received the mission card?”

Xi Su: “I, I guessed. We live together every day. If there were no constraints on physical contact, wouldn’t it be too easy?”

Yu Wen said nothing.

Chu Han, holding a plate, silently stood a bit farther from Xi Su.

It was foreseeable that during today’s recording, the two of them would keep this distance.

Xi Su’s expression had already stiffened. He turned around, pretending to be busy, and was annoyed: I shouldn’t have talked to Yu Wen…

Every word was a trap, every word was a trap.

He couldn’t help but show a helpless expression to the camera.

‘Gold Thief’ Xi Su — exposed.

Yu Wen was quiet for a while, staring at Xi Su’s back in thought. After a moment, he suddenly changed the subject, “You’re right.”

“Simply physical contact is too broad.”

Chu Han: … Do you really believe that?

Xi Su thought his suspicion was cleared and couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief.

Yu Wen didn’t explain further, tightened his water cup, and hopped out again.

–

After breakfast, the director announced today’s task location.

“In the past half month, all members have experienced a lot, putting in hard work to build their own little courtyards, windproof houses, fertile vegetable gardens, and clean and tidy poultry sheds… These wouldn’t have been possible without your efforts.

“After much consideration, the program team has decided to give everyone a break and invite you all to camp at the top of Luming Mountain, to enjoy the natural scenery.”

After hearing the first half, everyone was about to cheer, but when they heard ‘Luming Mountain,’ Song Chenglei started making calls again, “Hello, hello, taxi? Come pick me up. I’m not recording anymore…”

Yu Wen quietly asked Chu Han beside him, “Where is Luming Mountain?”

Chu Han: “A mountain a few kilometers away, very high and steep. We went to watch the sunrise in the second episode, but it wasn’t aired.”

Yu Wen nodded as if he understood. He asked, “Are you the ‘Gold Thief’?”

This sudden question made Chu Han’s expression freeze.

“…It seems not.” Yu Wen observed his expression thoughtfully.

Chu Han let out a breath from his chest, speechless, “Are you planning to ask everyone this today?”

“No, you were too close to me just now, blowing on my ear. I was afraid you were stealing my points.”

Chu Han: “You don’t have any points.”

Yu Wen remembered he was a guest and hadn’t completed any tasks.

“…Oh.”

The director continued to introduce the game rules.

Yu Wen suddenly raised his hand, “Director, how can I be stolen if I have no points?”

“Points have no lower limit and can be negative.”

Yu Wen took two seconds to react and said dumbfoundedly, “Will I be in debt after the show?”

“Pfft…” Chu Han couldn’t hold back and laughed out loud.

Song Chenglei laughed heartily, “Don’t worry, Xiao Yu, I’ll give you two points.”

Yu Wen: “Teacher Song, you’re so kind, giving me two percent of your points.”

Song Chenglei: “If you think it’s too little, forget it…”

“No, no, a senior’s generous help should be accepted.” Yu Wen hobbled over, took the plastic token representing two points from Song Chenglei’s hand, and said happily, “Even the smallest mosquito is still meat…”

His movement was inconvenient, so he stood beside Song Chenglei. Xi Su moved aside to make space for him.

“Hey Teacher Yu,” Xi Su suddenly pointed at his head, “There’s a piece of thread here.”

Yu Wen fiddled with it twice, and Xi Su directed him. Perhaps because of today’s special rules, to avoid suspicion, he never touched it himself.

“Teacher Song, it’s on your side, pinch it off.” Xi Su said.

Song Chenglei had been watching for a while, and even if Xi Su hadn’t asked, he would have helped. These two were making him headache with their clumsiness.

Song Chenglei pulled out a thread as long as a knuckle and casually flicked it away.

Yu Wen straightened his slightly messy appearance and suddenly thought of something, glancing at Xi Su with a meaningful look.

The director held up a megaphone: “… The production team has prepared picnic mats, tents, tableware, barbecue grills, and other utensils for you, but you need to prepare your own food. Luming Mountain has a lot of mountain delicacies like bamboo fungus and tea tree mushrooms. Please pick them on your way up the mountain to use as your lunch and dinner today.”

Another rule was that for every segment of the mountain you climbed, you completed a challenge and could earn a certain number of points. Points could be exchanged with the production team for meat and other supplies.

Song Chenglei felt something was off and asked, “Where does the hike start?”

The director pointed to the ground, “Here.”

Yu Wen felt his legs twitch as if reminding him of danger!

His face was serious, “Oh no, they’re targeting me.”

Receiving Yu Wen’s pleading look, Song Chenglei nodded heavily and spoke up righteously, “At least let Xiao Yu go down the mountain first. Otherwise, it’s like killing him!”

Anyone who has experienced leg pain knows that descending is a hundred times more difficult and painful than ascending.

The director said, “I’m very sorry, Teacher Yu, but the production team’s van has one seat available. If you can’t endure it, you can exchange thirty points for it.”

It was a test of his popularity!

Without thinking, Yu Wen turned and ran towards Chu Han. After two steps, feeling awkward, he switched to zombie hopping, extending his hands dramatically, “Teacher Chu — saving a life is more meritorious than building a seven-tiered pagoda —”

Tong Li: “Are you going to eat Xiao Chu?”

Song Chenglei: “Director, do you have black dog blood and peach wood swords?”

Chu Han was slow to react, still dazed as Yu Wen’s hands reached him. Just as the zombie hands were about to touch his shoulder, Xi Su raised his hand and spoke up, “How about I do it?”

Yu Wen turned to look at him.

The other MCs also looked at him.

“I get along well with Teacher Yu. Last night, he even called me brother,” Xi Su joked while pulling points from his pocket. “Coming to this show, it’s the first time someone called me brother… consider it a belated gift.”

Yu Wen blinked his eyes and immediately put on an innocent smile.

“Thank you, Brother Xi Su.”

–

Yu Wen gained a privilege, riding a car straight to the foot of Luming Mountain.

Between the two mountains was a flat road. Yu Wen sat in the back of a truck, enjoying the breeze on his face, feeling as if he were in a convertible.

… Except the small stool was a bit hard on his butt.

He shifted, pushed his windblown hair back, revealing his smooth forehead, and squinted to enjoy the scenery and fields passing by.

“Teacher Yu, how do you feel now?”

The accompanying PD, carrying the camera, asked.

“They walk while I ride. They suffer while I enjoy.” Yu Wen rested his chin on his hand, “The motto: A carefree life.”

The accompanying PD couldn’t help but laugh.

“Teacher Yu, you’re able to enjoy this thanks to Teacher Xi Su. Do you have anything to say to him?”

Yu Wen thought for a moment.

“Hope he doesn’t steal my points today.”

Accompanying PD: “Oh? Teacher Yu thinks Teacher Xi Su is the ‘Gold Thief’?”

Yu Wen smiled without answering, “Who knows.”

But in fact, his tone was full of certainty.

He had locked onto Xi Su not just because of the morning’s slip-up.

Xi Su’s words had reminded him. According to past episodes, the possibility of the production team directly adopting a guest’s suggestion was zero. They were good at switching concepts and blurring subjects to set traps.

They weren’t good at capturing hot topics, had chaotic editing, and almost no creativity, but they excelled at ‘battling wits’ with the MCs — the magical production team of “Mountain Courtyard”.

His original suggestion was, “Steal points by touching specific body parts, with points doubled for touching team members.” This rule was relatively complete, without major loopholes but lacked a subject.

(Who) touches (whose) specific parts to steal points?

If given a choice, for the ‘Gold Thief’, being outside these two brackets would be the least suspicious and safest.

For example, Song Chenglei touches Yu Wen’s hair → Xi Su steals Yu Wen’s points.

–

Yu Wen looked up at the stone steps of Luming Mountain that seemed to stretch endlessly.

Yu Wen: “Is Teacher Song almost here?”

The accompanying PD opened his phone and checked the shared map, “Other teachers can choose different routes. The more difficult the route, the higher the point reward. Teacher Song chose the farthest route and still needs some time.”

Yu Wen sighed, “Could you send him a message and ask for his taxi driver’s number?”

Accompanying PD: “You need the taxi number…”

Yu Wen: “To call a cab home.”

He knew the show was tough but hadn’t expected it to be this tough. Every challenge was clearly designed to train special forces.

The production team had set up parasols and supply points. Yu Wen mingled with the staff to hide in the shade. After ten o’clock, the sun became intense, making people dizzy.

Everyone was busy, leaving him bored. To avoid disturbing the staff, Yu Wen got up and wandered around the mountain’s base.

On a weekday morning, there weren’t many people hiking, almost none. About three hundred meters from the supply point, he found a new-style public restroom. It looked antique, with carved windows on both sides.

Inside, it was also clean, exuding an unspoiled elegance, seemingly just cleaned, with a scent of disinfectant in the air.

Most importantly, there was air conditioning.

Yu Wen casually pulled two pieces of paper, wiped the toilet seat in a cubicle, and sat cross-legged to play games.

Less than ten minutes later, someone entered.

Yu Wen, wearing one earphone, heard it but didn’t mind.

The person entered the cubicle next to him, with rustling sounds and the noise of unzipping a backpack.

Green blocks formed a large patch on the screen, and Yu Wen was clearing the extra colored blocks on the sides, trying to connect more green ones.

“Director… about this scene, I have a question… do you have time tonight…”

Next door, someone was playing an audio recording.

The volume was low, and the recording, which had a scratchy, crackling sound and occasionally cut off, seemed to have been secretly recorded from somewhere.

Yu Wen cleared a red block and, hearing the next line, his hand jerked, causing the connected green blocks to break apart.

“Oh, Chu Han.”

The green blocks were cut down to just seven or eight, a significant loss.

But Yu Wen wasn’t in the mood to be frustrated. He exited the game app and took off his earphones.

Director Gao’s voice was very distinctive; even through the damaged audio, he could recognize it unmistakably because of Gao’s unique tone, volume, and irritable manner.

In the crackling audio, Gao Kaiyu’s voice was hoarser than usual, and under the noise interference, it had an oddly gentle quality.

“Alright, come find me tonight.”

Yu Wen’s mind raced.

First: Who was next door? Second: What was the purpose of this audio? Third…

Why did he stumble upon this again?

Was this a scene requiring a passerby?

While Yu Wen brainstormed for these few minutes, the person next door started typing on a computer, cutting several audio clips together, creating an ambiguous “unspoken rule” scenario.

Frowning, Yu Wen turned on his phone’s recorder.

He had encountered this before. Chu Han, fresh out of university and naive about social interactions, had always done whatever the group leader said. Before Yu Wen had intervened once, Chu Han had even approached Director Gao a few times to discuss the script, always appearing earnest and upright, so neither of them thought much of it.

Until a male supporting actor made explicit his intentions of unspoken rules, Director Gao turned on him, and Chu Han finally snapped out of it.

Since then, he naturally never met with the director alone again. However, if the previous conversations were leaked, edited, and spliced together, it would be quite suggestive.

It seemed today he needed to play the role of a righteous passerby. Yu Wen sighed.

He discreetly moved his phone closer to the source of the sound, aiming to capture clearer audio.

While someone was maliciously editing, he was secretly recording the malicious editing. A bright future awaited them all.

Another person entered the restroom.

Yu Wen’s attention wasn’t on the newcomers; instead, the audio next door abruptly paused, giving off a guilty vibe.

The few recorded segments had already been spliced together, naturally arousing curiosity. Rearranging the order and adding some tech enhancements would turn it into a bombshell.

Before the newcomer entered, the person next door was playing the finished product, admiring their work.

When someone came in, they immediately paused it.

Yu Wen hesitated for a moment. To avoid editing suspicion and ensure the audio’s integrity, he decided to record the final product as well, thus not ending the recording.

He silently apologized to the person urinating at the urinal.

—Sorry, I’m not intentionally recording your urination sounds.

If this recording later punished the wrongdoers, let Chu Han and Gao Kaiyu give you a banner.

Inscribed with: A Divine Urination.

Amen.

“Teacher Yu?” While his thoughts were chaotic, the person outside washed their hands and then came back, calling out in the silent restroom: “Teacher Yu, are you here?”

Yu Wen: “…”

Oh my God.

He held his breath, feeling like his heart was about to jump out of his chest. He pursed his lips tightly, determined not to respond even if he died.

That person walked over, pushing each cubicle door in turn. When they reached Yu Wen’s cubicle, finding it wouldn’t budge, they knocked, “Buddy, how long have you been here?”

Yu Wen: … If I could, I’d squat here until the end of time, until the seas dry up and the rocks crumble, and heaven and earth merge, never to part with you…

“Have you seen our Teacher Yu? Very thin, small face, a teardrop mole at the corner of his right eye, shining all over, clearly an artist, a young man.”

Yu Wen: … Thank you.

Seeing no response, the person outside muttered, “Why so shy… Anyway, buddy, if you see our Teacher Yu, tell him the other MCs are almost here, and we’re about to start recording. Ask him to come back quickly.”

Yu Wen listened to the footsteps recede, feeling a whirlwind of emotions.

A dull thud from next door pulled Yu Wen back from his drifting thoughts. He instinctively perked up his ears.

Perhaps in panic, the person next door hit the play button again, causing the audio to start playing once more.

Yu Wen bent over, aiming his phone’s microphone towards the source next door.

It was just a minute-long audio.

The editing next door was quick, and his recording was swift.

By the time the laptop was snapped shut heavily, he had almost finished recording the whole process.

Yu Wen quickly backed up the recording and sent a copy to Gao Kaiyu. Halfway through the file transfer, he sensed something and looked up.

A blue head poked over the top of the stall, staring at him menacingly.

Yu Wen, shocked by this horror movie-like scene, swore.

Yu Wen: “Damn.”

Xi Su’s tightly furrowed brows slightly relaxed, gritting his teeth: “Teacher Yu.”

–

Two figures dashed out of the public restroom.

Yu Wen appeared to be walking but was actually running at full speed, dodging Xi Su’s reaching hands like a snake.

Xi Su followed closely behind, several times almost grabbing his collar, only for Yu Wen to slip away like a fish.

“Damn.” Xi Su cursed, his voice close behind.

See, see, his true nature is exposed, even cursing. Yu Wen was more convinced he intended to kill him to silence him, running like a snake.

“Teacher Yu…” Xi Su seemed to want to say something.

Yu Wen: I’m not listening, I’m not listening. Escape first!

“Hey, Teacher Yu, Teacher Xi, come on, we’ve been waiting for you.” An observant staff member spotted their sprinting figures, and their kind smile radiated like the light of the Virgin Mary in Yu Wen’s eyes.

Saved!

In the last few steps, he picked up speed and sprinted over.

“Teacher Chu—”

Chu Han had just stopped, sweating profusely and drinking water, when a small firecracker came charging down the Mountain Courtyard.

Yu Wen rushed to his side, still shaken, and said, “Oh, Teacher Chu, it’s so good to see you.”

Chu Han almost got knocked over, and everything in front of him swayed.

Chu Han: “I…”

He thought he just saw his great-grandmother.