RSDH CH57

Initially agreed on two years, then wanted to extend for another year, and now simply saying let’s not divorce.

Duan Xingye couldn’t sleep anyway. Sitting up facing the sofa, his exquisite chin lifted: “What do you want to do?”

Relying on the darkness so his embarrassed expression wouldn’t fall into Duan Xingye’s eyes, Cheng Duzhou said in a low and steady voice: “Just feel it’s quite good now. I don’t annoy you much. You can do what you want without family burden. Moreover, two people together can look after each other. If you are dissatisfied with the current situation anywhere, you can say it, I will correct it.”

Moonlight flowed in along the open window edge, tightening on Duan Xingye’s smooth jawline.

Duan Xingye couldn’t say where the anger came from. Feeling like being scratched on an itch, but stopped immediately. The unsatisfied itch turned into irritability, very unpleasant.

Duan Xingye had long felt something was wrong; Cheng Duzhou was too much like a perfect husband.

Perhaps for Cheng Duzhou, marriage was marriage. Having accepted the role of a husband, he would naturally push the post-marital relationship forward, fulfilling his duties to maintain it well, satisfying the other half everywhere.

But Duan Xingye wasn’t happy about this.

Did Cheng Duzhou have romantic love for him?

Cheng Duzhou didn’t say it, but Duan Xingye believed there definitely was.

Without love and not seeking his wealth or fame, why stick to this marriage? Connecting everything since the two participated in the romance variety show, if he still couldn’t see it, Duan Xingye would be a fool.

But was this what he wanted?

To put it bluntly, even if the person who married Cheng Duzhou two years ago wasn’t him, Cheng Duzhou could still have tears in his eyes in the auditorium today.

Duan Xingye didn’t care for it.

Just saying, on what grounds must he respond just because Cheng Duzhou liked him?

A breath blocked his throat.

“Forget it, we are not suitable,” he said. “If you want someone to look after, find someone else.”

Duan Xingye threw the quilt high and lay down. The quilt fell with it, covering half his face.

Seeing him with eyes closed, brows slightly knitted, never relaxing.

Duan Xingye saying not suitable wasn’t out of spite. A marriage full of tolerance everywhere would eventually come to an end; no one needs to compromise for the sake of completeness.

Cheng Duzhou hugged the pillow in his arms tightly, burying his face, rubbing the tip of his nose against the edge of the pillow towel, not speaking.

Silence continued in the room, but both knew the other wasn’t asleep.

Probably a minute passed.

The sound of Cheng Duzhou muttering to himself rang out, sounding lonely and desolate in the dark night.

“Then I’ll be a twice-married man.”

“…”

Duan Xingye pursed his lips straight, not wanting to listen to him, pulling the quilt higher to cover his head.

The man’s magnetic voice was even lower, crumpled and somewhat poignant: “Will anyone want a twice-married man…”

“…”

Duan Xingye silently gritted his teeth.

Cheng Duzhou sniffled very lightly and said, “Better not harm others, I’m dirty… What do you think?”

Think your head!

With a fiery temper, Duan Xingye sat up, threw off the quilt, got out of bed, walked to the sofa, lifted his foot, stepped on Cheng Duzhou, and kicked non-stop.

He bit out words between his teeth: “Chirping and whining, sleeping or not tonight? Sleeping or not? Hm?”

This was the first time Duan Xingye saw a man binding himself with male virtue; seemed to have that serious illness.

Cheng Duzhou didn’t dodge when kicked, even flattening out on the sofa, turning over his belly for him to kick.

Local dog appearance.

Duan Xingye was angry out of nowhere. For this kind of thick-skinned guy, kicking until tired wasn’t worth it for himself. He put down his foot, looking down from above: “Say one more bullshit word, sleep outside!”

Cheng Duzhou grabbed his wrist, lifting the quilt on one side, asking: “Want to come up? You’ll be cold like this.”

Their room had a square super-large wooden window facing the lush fields directly. Looking forward, tall grass undulated in layers in the dark night. The moon hung in a corner, like the bright moon rising above the sea.

The air here was fresh, something not felt in Shanghai. Therefore, before sleeping, they deliberately didn’t close the window. The cool night breeze blew in through the lattice. Duan Xingye only wore thin pajamas; reminded by Cheng Duzhou, he indeed felt cold.

He stepped on the sofa again, kicking Cheng Duzhou inward impatiently.

But Cheng Duzhou insisted on giving up the inner position to him.

After Duan Xingye lay down, it was very crowded.

Only then remembered, why couldn’t he go back to bed and lie down comfortably.

“…”

Must have been confused by anger.

Cheng Duzhou had reached the limit of the sofa edge, making a small inch of space for Duan Xingye.

Two people face to face, nose to nose.

Cheng Duzhou’s pitch-black eyes had light even at night, staring straight at him.

One second, two seconds passed; Duan Xingye hadn’t reacted yet. But as time went on, he felt uncomfortable. Because of forcefully resisting the urge to divert his gaze, his small face was slightly tight, appearing serious.

Hearing Cheng Duzhou suggest not divorcing, Duan Xingye felt dizzy for a moment, his whole person sinking.

When accepting the proposal on the high-altitude jump platform during the day, he vaguely felt something. When attending the wedding in the church, he was somewhat certain. Until that moment, he finally understood Cheng Duzhou’s affection for him.

No wonder he gave a wedding ring, even calling it for business.

No wonder he often stared at him unblinkingly, increasingly looking like a pervert when with him.

No wonder he was traumatized to death by CP videos, calling him in the middle of the night to go crazy.

Duan Xingye was a bit surprised. The former Cheng Duzhou was indifferent to him; how did he suddenly seem enlightened.

But thinking carefully, it wasn’t that surprising. Childhood didn’t count; Cheng Duzhou didn’t have thoughts in that aspect. But now married, relations that should happen happened. After spending a long time together, must think in the direction of love. Someone as excellent as him, good-looking, multi-talented, full of charm; really hard not to love.

Duan Xingye’s heart was warm. Unfortunately, the good mood didn’t last long. Cheng Duzhou gave him a painless reason for why not divorce. This made him furious yet very calm.

He didn’t need a perfect husband; preferred being single.

He wasn’t bound by the form of marriage because that paper was too brittle to restrain anyone.

Who can guarantee the other half will remain perfect forever?

But while sober, Duan Xingye couldn’t control his mood and reaction.

Just like now, being looked at by Cheng Duzhou with such a direct gaze, Duan Xingye felt his face heat up.

Thus grumpy: “Looking at what?”

Cheng Duzhou said, “Duan Xingye.”

“Speak.”

“You are too proud.”

There was moonlight at night. Facing the window, the light in Cheng Duzhou’s pitch-black eyes floated twice, shaking out a very shallow smile, forced to let go.

“I’m unworthy of climbing high (marrying up).”

What bullshit again; sounded like mockery.

“Good that you know.”

Duan Xingye couldn’t be bothered to pay attention, didn’t want to look at Cheng Duzhou. Wanted to turn around but gave up due to the overly narrow space.

He had to bury his face, but due to distance, had to hide in Cheng Duzhou’s arms.

Duan Xingye started feeling tired since returning to the homestay, but Cheng Duzhou didn’t go to bed, so he couldn’t sleep.

He slept lightly when away from home, but unknown when the habit formed, he could definitely sleep deeply in Cheng Duzhou’s arms. Maybe liking that wrapped sense of security, or maybe because Cheng Duzhou had a familiar scent, the smell of home.

Amidst hazy thoughts, Duan Xingye felt his lower back being held. Because of the close distance between the two, the sofa had some space again. Even if crowded, it didn’t feel uncomfortable anymore. Duan Xingye spontaneously extended his arm, wrapping around Cheng Duzhou’s neck.

Cheng Duzhou lowered his voice in his ear: “You haven’t said yet, is extending for a year okay.”

In Duan Xingye’s chaotic mind, many images flashed. Only when his mind relaxed did he have to admit some things to himself.

Time spent with Cheng Duzhou on the variety show was happy.

Cheng Duzhou coming to see his performance, he felt long-lost satisfaction.

He wasn’t born to like loneliness and coldness. The former him was livelier and more active than anyone, thus also craving sharing, being watched, being accepted by another person, accepting others.

But his ability was indeed limited, and trust in beautiful things was also limited.

Duan Xingye didn’t have much love for his mother anymore, but would still think of her often.

His mother was independent and free, but because the love was too deep, she was almost destroyed when separating, crying very embarrassingly, leaving not dashingly enough.

Duan Xingye gradually realized he was still shrinking in the past shadow, so for a long time, he was unwilling to invest himself in a relationship.

But when the sun shone in, having bathed in warmth, he couldn’t bear to drive it away.

Duan Xingye opened sleepy eyes. The upturned eye corners revealed a trace of blame and complaint. He pressed Cheng Duzhou’s head down, voice blurry: “Shut up…”

Cheng Duzhou was easily lost in the kiss, thus never knowing whether renewing for another year was okay or not.

The next morning, the cameras in all rooms opened on time.

The center of the four screens were all big beds; guests were still sleeping.

Only on [Lü Ye Shu Huai]’s side was it different. Only piled quilts on the bed.

Bullet comments: Where are the people?

Old Xu didn’t believe the couple would get up so early. controlling the camera to turn half a circle, finally found them.

On a not-so-large sofa, Duan Xingye lay on top of Cheng Duzhou, one arm hanging outside, both sleeping soundly.

“…”

Livestream discussion.

“Leaving the bed unslept?”

“Maybe just like squeezing like this.”

“Relationship so good it’s enviable.”

Five minutes later, alarms in all livestreams rang. Under the lens, guests were seen getting up dawdlingly.

Duan Xingye slept very well. Holding the sofa to prop himself up, looking at the wooden window beside him, blown by the fresh wind, squinting in the morning sun.

Duan Xingye got off the sofa, but Cheng Duzhou lay with eyes open, motionless.

Duan Xingye’s voice was still a bit hoarse: “Can get up now.”

Cheng Duzhou said, “Numb.”

“…”

Duan Xingye glanced at Cheng Duzhou, having forgotten when he climbed onto him to sleep.

“Where numb.”

Cheng Duzhou raised a hand to press his left chest: “Heart.”

“…” Duan Xingye didn’t spoil him. Passing by, he pinched Cheng Duzhou’s arm hanging on the side.

Cheng Duzhou immediately turned sideways to hug his arm, veins faintly throbbing on his neck, lips pursed in endurance.

Really numb.

__

Author’s Note:

President Cheng: Numb, the broken heart of a twice-married man.