AEOGA CH13

Xie Chongjin knew that the Chancellor and his wife had not seen Lu Xuechao for a long time and must have much to say. His presence would ultimately make the two elders feel constrained, so he considerately withdrew, leaving the space entirely to the reunited family of three.

Once Xie Chongjin left, the Chancellor’s wife indeed relaxed a great deal. Pulling Lu Xuechao close, he looked him up and down, examining him minutely. “Have you truly not suffered any grievances?”

Not wishing to worry his parents, Lu Xuechao merely smiled and said, “Look at this room, Papa. Do I look like someone who has suffered grievances?”

That, indeed, he did not.

Yet the Chancellor’s wife’s heart still ached for him. “Even though His Majesty was merely acting fatuously because he was plotted against by Yelang, some things are already beyond remedy, no matter how much he wishes to make amends now. These past three years… His Majesty has inducted so many consorts into the harem. In the future, they will still have to pay their morning and evening respects to you. It is only natural that you would harbor a grievance. If you do not wish to pay them any heed, then simply ignore them. With your father and me as your backing, you need not fear offending anyone. Do not force yourself to suffer just to be a magnanimous and virtuous Empress.”

Chancellor Lu said in a deep voice, “If you are unwilling to remain in the palace, your father shall immediately submit a memorial. Even if I must throw away this official position, I will beg His Majesty to permit you to leave the palace and marry someone else.”

Though the Chancellor’s wife possessed a gentle disposition, he was exceptionally unyielding when it came to matters of the heart. In his youth, his beauty had captivated the entire capital, and suitors had practically broken down his threshold. However, the moment he put forward a single requirement, more than half of his pursuers vanished instantly.

—He demanded that the other party swear an oath never to take concubines, have bedchamber maids, keep external mistresses, or frequent courtesans for the rest of their life. Should they violate this oath, their family estate would wither, and their line of descendants would be severed.

One must understand that in this world, even ordinary commoners would maintain one or two concubines, and noble families were naturally teeming with wives and concubines. As the saying goes, “A wife is not as good as a consort, and a consort is not as good as a stolen affair.” To remain completely faithful for a lifetime was simply too difficult; no one dared guarantee they could achieve it, let alone swear such a venomous oath. His criteria for choosing a husband were practically shocking and nothing short of a pipe dream.

Yet, there happened to be one person who dared to agree, and that was the young Chancellor Lu.

Later, Chancellor Lu used half his life to prove to the world that “one life, one couple, for eternity” was not a foolish dream; there truly were people who could achieve it.

Influenced by his parents, Lu Xuechao, like his papa, could not tolerate a single grain of sand in his eyes, nor could he forgive emotional betrayal. Initially, when Xie Chongjin was widely gathering a harem and Lu Xuechao did not yet know he was being controlled by others, he had truly harbored the intention of dragging Xie Chongjin down to the grave with him. Had his sense of the bigger picture not won out—unwilling to cause national turmoil by assassinating the monarch—he would have acted.

And he did act—in those worlds where Xie Chongjin’s Diligence stat fell below 60, the country was going to face turmoil regardless, so he figured he might as well take action.

Only after learning that this was not Xie Chongjin’s true intent did Lu Xuechao reluctantly accept the reality. The act of regicide shifted from a state of mind meant to punish a faithless man to a means of granting his lover release.

What else could he do but accept? Was he supposed to nurse a grudge against Xie Chongjin? It wasn’t Xie Chongjin’s fault; Xie Chongjin was even more miserable than he was.

He could not fail to distinguish between good and evil, nor could he be blind to right and wrong.

Yet no matter how much he reasoned with himself, before discovering that Xie Chongjin had never actually touched any of the consorts, Lu Xuechao’s heart had still been filled with an agonizing amount of grievance.

…How could he possibly not care?

This was clearly his Crown Prince brother.

He belonged to him, and could only belong to him. How did he suddenly become everyone else’s?

The players had dubbed Lu Xuechao a “Yandere,” and in a certain sense, they weren’t entirely wrong. From childhood to youth, Xie Chongjin’s meticulous care and protection had caused Lu Xuechao to develop an intensely fierce possessiveness over him.

His desire to monopolize Xie Chongjin was so strong that he didn’t even want to bear children for him, unwilling to have another person divide Xie Chongjin’s love—a possessiveness that bordered on the pathological.

It wasn’t merely a fear of pain.

Lu Xuechao was naturally brilliant beyond measure; whatever he desired, he could obtain through his own calculations. Yet with his elders spoiling him and the Crown Prince protecting him, he didn’t even need to use his brains; someone would naturally present it to him on a silver platter. He had never suffered the agony of unrequited yearning. The things he liked could only ever belong exclusively to him. If someone else so much as laid a finger on it, he would cast it away.

Aside from his parents, Xie Chongjin was the person he loved most. Inseparable since childhood, wed upon growing up, no one had ever come between them, nor had he ever imagined someone could.

Yet across so many worlds, Lu Xuechao had lived through every single special storyline written in the heavenly book between Xie Chongjin and the various Plot Consorts. To him, those were not merely plotlines on a page; they were events that had genuinely transpired.

During the New Year’s Eve imperial banquets, he would watch Xie Chongjin exchange sweet whispers with others, holding them close in a display of tender affection. He would keep his eyes lowered in solitude, listening to the merry laughter from that side, his food gradually losing all taste.

During the hunts at the enclosure, he would watch Xie Chongjin teach that young prince from the Xifeng Kingdom how to shoot an arrow hand-in-hand, reminding him of how Xie Chongjin used to correct his horse stance when they were young, saying, “We have only ever personally taught you alone.” Filled with an inexplicable vexation, he would turn around and head back to his tent.

During the unbearable heat of midsummer, Xie Chongjin would take a crowd of consorts to the imperial villa for a summer retreat, while he was never included on the list. When Lu Xuechao received the news, he wasn’t surprised and accepted it calmly, but at night, he would be startled awake by the oppressive heat, tossing and turning, unable to fall asleep. Remembering how Huaiyun would always fan him in the past to coax him to sleep, whereas now there was no one beside him, he would bury himself beneath the quilt and weep from sorrow.

On the night of the Mid-Autumn Festival, he would set a simple table of wine in the courtyard, recalling how the two of them used to drink together under the moon at this exact time year after year. A part of his heart actually hoped that the man would come, only to hear his attendant report that His Majesty had slipped out of the palace tonight to spend time with a courtesan leader under the flowers and moon, boating upon the lake. He would space out for a long while, pouring and drinking by himself until he was thoroughly intoxicated, raising his cup to invite the bright moon, facing his shadow to make a party of three.

All the special plotlines of the Plot Consorts that made the players squeal with delight and scream “I’m shipping them so hard!” were, to Lu Xuechao, a blade cutting into his heart, slicing it into a thousand pieces—a slow execution more agonizing than being granted death by poisoned wine, a dagger, or three feet of white silk.

No matter how clearly he understood that these were all fake and that Xie Chongjin was unwilling, after the cycle repeated far too many times, Lu Xuechao would also begin to lose his grip on what was real and what was artificial.

Lu Xuechao was a highly rational person, but if rationality can overpower emotion, it only means the emotion is not yet strong enough. His feelings for Xie Chongjin far outweighed his rationality; it was impossible for him to remain sane forever.

Lu Xuechao had long since gone mad.

Xie Chongjin, unable to control himself for thousands of lifetimes as he watched his beloved being hurt by his own hands time and again—how could he not have gone mad as well? How could the trauma accumulated over lifetimes upon lifetimes be erased just like that?

They were merely two broken madmen who, when facing the person they loved, still tried their utmost to pretend to be normal. By doing so, they could act as if nothing had ever happened, wishing to preserve their best selves before one another, refusing to let the other see how blood-drenched and agonizing it was beneath the surface.

Even though both knew perfectly well in their hearts that they were no longer those youths, and could never return to the carefree days of their youth.

The Chancellor’s wife did not know exactly what hardships Lu Xuechao had suffered, but he understood his own child. How could he fail to notice the change in Lu Xuechao’s aura?

His child had once been proud and unrestrained, yet this current display of forbearance and composure indicated a massive shift in his state of mind.

Even if the Emperor taking consorts was out of necessity, he had taken them nonetheless; how could Qingshu not be heartbroken and deeply affected?

Initially, he had been against Lu Xuechao marrying the Crown Prince. The Crown Prince was the heir to the throne, the future supreme ruler, the person least likely under heaven to be single-minded.

Rather than the honor of being an Empress, he preferred his child to “gain a single heart, never to part until their hair turns white.”

Yet they had also witnessed just how profound the bond between the two children was. Xie Chongjin was exceptionally fond of Lu Xuechao. Aside from studying together, he frequently invited Lu Xuechao to the Eastern Palace, doing their schoolwork together in the evening and routinely having him stay overnight.

Lu Xuechao’s constitution was weak, and there were times he couldn’t enter the palace as a study companion, staying home to recuperate. The young Crown Prince would head straight to the Chancellor’s estate the moment school was dismissed to visit Lu Xuechao, personally feeding him soup and medicine, and he had even stayed at the Chancellor’s estate for a period of time.

It was during that period that the Chancellor’s wife came to believe that the Crown Prince truly could be single-minded toward Qingshu.

He still remembered the day the Crown Prince graced the Chancellor’s estate with his presence; both Chancellor Lu and the Chancellor’s wife had gone to the front gates to welcome him. Xie Chongjin excused them from their salutations, a look of sheer urgency on his face as he merely stated he was here to see Qingshu.

The Chancellor and his wife then brought the Crown Prince to Lu Xuechao’s room. At that time, Lu Xuechao was fourteen years old and already so beautiful that one couldn’t look away. Leaning weakly against the headboard with a pale complexion, he looked so delicate that anyone who saw him would feel a pang of pity.

Seeing Xie Chongjin enter the room, Lu Xuechao was slightly surprised. “Huai… Your Highness, why have you come?” Saying this, he made to get out of bed to offer his salutations.

They never stood on ceremony in private, but since his father and papa were present right now, he still had to keep up appearances. For the Lu family to hold immense power and stand tall for a century without falling, they naturally possessed their own way of survival, placing the utmost importance on the distinction between ruler and minister, never allowing any presumption or disrespect lest it arouse the monarch’s suspicion.

Xie Chongjin pressed him down, refusing to let him move. “When I saw you didn’t come to school today, I knew you were sick again, so I immediately brought the imperial physicians over.”

Lu Xuechao touched his forehead. “It is merely a common cold; a physician from the common folk could examine it. Every time you trouble the imperial physicians, it is far too much of a commotion.”

The Imperial Academy of Medicine was clearly meant for the nobles in the palace, yet over the years, the Crown Prince had handled it in such a way that they had practically become Lu Xuechao’s personal physicians.

“How did you catch a chill again?” Xie Chongjin’s brow furrowed. “Did you kick the blanket off again while sleeping last night?”

“I don’t think so…” Lu Xuechao’s words were evasive. “When I was staying at the Eastern Palace a while back, didn’t I manage to avoid catching a chill? It proves I don’t kick the blankets.”

Likely guided by his upbringing, Lu Xuechao was highly courteous and proper when awake, his behavior serving as a textbook standard for noble etiquette. Yet at his core, he wasn’t someone who loved sticking blindly to conventions, which resulted in him being rather unrestrained in his dreams.

Commonly known as having a rather poor sleeping posture.

Consequently, when he was first invited by Xie Chongjin to stay overnight at the Eastern Palace, Lu Xuechao had declined several times, deeply afraid that his sleeping posture would be discovered by Xie Chongjin, which would be far too embarrassing and subject him to Xie Chongjin’s teasing.

Fortunately, whenever he woke up in the Eastern Palace, his hands and feet would be neatly positioned, and the blanket would be perfectly covering him without anything too out of line, saving his dignity.

“It’s not that you don’t kick the blankets; it’s that We stayed mindful every single night, constantly paying attention to pull them back up for you. We had to tuck you in four or five times a night.” Xie Chongjin exposed him ruthlessly. “You even kicked Us out of bed. The moment We climbed back up, We were kicked back down by you.”

Lu Xuechao froze. “……Huh?”

The Chancellor and his wife: “……”

The Crown Prince didn’t execute their son for that?

Not only did he not execute him, he had even quietly adjusted Lu Xuechao’s posture as he hogged the entire bed, never once waking him up.

“You really ought to have a night watchman whose sole job is to tuck you in every night.” Xie Chongjin sighed. “The moment We don’t watch over you for a single day, you catch a chill. It truly makes it hard to be at ease. In the future, you might as well just live in the Eastern Palace. Let Us be your night watchman; We guarantee We will be far more competent than your servants.”

Chancellor Lu could finally listen no further. “Your Highness has not yet wed. For Xuechao to long reside in the Eastern Palace would be detrimental to Your Highness’s reputation.”

An occasional stay could be explained away as friendship, but a permanent residence would be entirely unseemly. Lacking a title or status was beneficial to no one.

Moreover, for the dignified Crown Prince to serve as a night-watching servant for their son… what sort of display was that?

“True, We were inconsiderate.” Xie Chongjin said in a seemingly casual manner, “Then… would the position of Crown Princess be considered perfectly legitimate?”

Those words were far too sudden, leaving Chancellor Lu and the Chancellor’s wife momentarily not daring to respond.

Yet Lu Xuechao dared to answer: “Even a Crown Princess cannot be with the Crown Prince day and night. The Crown Prince will still have many side consorts and concubines, and will have to divide his days among them.”

The Chancellor and his wife wished for nothing more than to cover their son’s mouth. A person who was usually so well-read and well-mannered—had he lost his mind to dare say such things before the Crown Prince?

What was even more astounding was that Xie Chongjin said without a second thought, “If Qingshu is the Crown Princess, We shall absolutely never have side consorts or concubines.”

At that time, both of them were too young, so the matter was treated entirely as a jest. Yet the Chancellor’s wife had seen the absolute earnestness in the Crown Prince’s eyes when he spoke those words.

He had been truly loved by someone, so he knew that the Crown Prince’s affection could not be feigned.

Therefore, when the Crown Prince formally came to propose marriage two years later, the Chancellor’s wife agreed as well, believing that they truly could grow old together in perfect harmony.

Sleeping posture was even less of an issue; once held securely in Xie Chongjin’s embrace, how could Lu Xuechao move about randomly?

Who could have foreseen the cruel twists of fate? In a short span of three years, His Majesty would end up with a harem of three thousand beauties.

With a disposition like Qingshu’s, asking him to play the role of affectionate siblings with a crowd of people who shared his husband was absolutely impossible.

The Chancellor’s wife truly could not bear to see his son suffer that grievance.

Hearing the profound care in his parents’ words, a wave of warmth filled Lu Xuechao’s heart.

The Lu family had been loyal ministers for generations, never defying an imperial decree. Yet when it came to his happiness, both his father and papa placed him above all else.

“His Majesty… has not touched anyone else,” Lu Xuechao spoke up. “Father, Papa, there is no need to worry yourselves over me.”

The Chancellor and his wife: “……?!”

“Is His Majesty not rumored to be afflicted by a curse and deeply infatuated with beauty? Over these past three years, he has indeed summoned the harem every single night…” The Chancellor’s wife said in shock. “How could he possibly manage to not touch anyone else?”

For a moment, Lu Xuechao didn’t know how to explain it either. After a long pause, he managed to scramble together an excuse: “Presumably, he adheres strictly to male virtue.”