YA Ch66: The Commander

The bullet screen was stunned by this bizarre maneuver.

[What is this? A nuclear-powered donkey?]

[What Red Hare, what donkey? I dare you to say that again in front of Lord Guan!]

[Hahaha, hurry up, catch up to President Ming and change the donkey back! Before Hua Wenyuan sees it.]

[If Hua Wenyuan sees it, this story won’t just be about ghost immortals in the underworld; it’ll turn into a science documentary.]

[Did you all notice that President Ming is more lively than before?]

Lu Yu also noticed that Yan-ge was more lively than before. When he had just arrived, Ming Yan always had a gloomy look and spoke very little. Now, he smiled more, and talked more.

“Yan-ge, you’re naughtier than before,” Lu Yu said as he tried to catch up to Ming Yan on his race donkey, but the donkey was too fast, so he had to pull back constantly, making him look like a sorrowful heroine chasing a train, wobbling with each sentence.

Ming Yan glanced over, pursing his lips to hold back a laugh, “Am I?”

“I like you like this,” Lu Yu smiled at him. What had caused Yan-ge to change like this? Was it the kiss during the first snowfall, or was it because he resisted the magical attack and didn’t turn into Lu Dayu? He touched his chin. “People really do need weekends.”

Ming Yan: “…”

Seeing that Yan-ge didn’t reply, Lu Yu pulled his donkey, performing tricks, “Yan-ge, look at my race donkey, cool, right?”

The donkey reared up as if trying to mimic a heroic horse, but with its short legs, it could only kick up dust, almost throwing Lu Yu off.

Ming Yan lowered his head, laughing quietly, unable to bear watching.

Lu Yu grimaced, “Good brother, hurry and change it back for me. If Xiao Yuan sees it, he’ll think I embezzled a warhorse and traded it for a donkey to pocket the difference.”

Ming Yan refused, “Perfect timing; let General Hua make an example out of you, execute his own uncle to establish military authority.”

Lu Yu puffed up his cheeks, “Am I the chicken? Then if you marry me, it’s ‘marry a chicken, follow the chicken.’ We’ll be the rooster and hen, and Hua Wenyuan will be the chick!”

Ming Yan quickly motioned for him to shut up. Saying “chicken” too many times could get them censored.

People are always sensitive to the sound of their own name. Hearing his, Hua Wenyuan immediately turned around.

Lu Yu panicked, scrambling to cover the donkey’s ears. However, while he could cover the ears, he couldn’t hide the tail, so he awkwardly grinned, “If I said this is actually a short-legged horse, would you believe me?”

Hua Wenyuan glanced at the tall, well-built horse Lu Yu was riding and was puzzled, “No.”

Lu Yu looked down and realized that, at some point, his donkey had turned back into a horse. He turned to look at Ming Yan, who was completely composed, acting as if nothing had happened.

Hua Wenyuan had long grown accustomed to his uncle’s occasional antics, so he urged his horse forward to approach Lu Yu, “Uncle, for this upcoming battle for Mountain City, how about you take the role of commander?”

Lu Yu stared in shock at the unfilial son asking his elderly father to go fight a war, “With my old arms and legs, you want me to lead a siege?”

Hua Wenyuan’s mouth twitched, “Uncle, you’re the most skilled fighter in the Hua family. How could you not lead a siege? As we fight for our empire, you need battle merits too.”

The soldiers had long been displeased with their freeloading uncle. If he kept lazing around like this, he’d end up as just another idle relative of the Hua family, which wasn’t what Hua Wenyuan wanted. His ideal was brothers fighting tigers together, father and son going to war, with his cousin and uncle both becoming valiant generals, making their mark in history.

Lu Yu slumped over his horse, whining, “What do I need battle merits for? I’m just waiting for you to become emperor; then you can make me a carefree prince. I’ll spend my days eating, drinking, playing with cats, teasing well-behaved young men…”

Hua Wenyuan: “…”

Lu Yu glanced back, seeing his son’s displeased face. He smacked his lips and sat up, “I was just kidding. Fine, I’ll fight. Watch your uncle show you a textbook siege.”

The small city had narrow roads and was easy to defend but hard to attack, with steep mountains and valleys on both sides. If the mountains stretched for miles, this place could serve as a pass where one man could hold off ten thousand. But the area was too small. An army heading south could simply go around, so leaving the place unguarded wasn’t much of a problem. Mountain bandits had occupied the city, and no one could come to their aid.

From afar, they saw the city wall made of rammed earth, with ragtag bandits standing atop it, each holding large, crude bows.

These mountain bandits, though lacking fine weapons, had accumulated some wealth from years of robbing travelers. They had homemade hunting bows, used for hunting wild boars in the mountains, with considerable power.

In the original story, this part was purely for showing off Hua Wenyuan’s skills. The bandit, thinking he had perfect aim, stood on the city wall to challenge Hua Wenyuan to a duel of archery. Hua Wenyuan, however, shot an arrow that not only split the bandit’s arrowhead in midair but also pierced his skull.

Sure enough, before long, a hideous bandit with a face full of scars appeared on the city wall, grinning wickedly, “Hua Wenyuan, I’ve heard you can hit a bullseye from a hundred steps away. Let’s see if your fancy bow is better than my hunting bow.”

Lu Yu rode forward, lazily swinging his spear as he yelled, “No way, I’ve heard you stole chickens at three, groped dogs at five, and ran around the streets naked at fifteen. You only got that bandit leader title because the last one sold himself. If we’re talking about being shameless, who could beat you?”

[Hahahahaha, Lu Yu, what’s gotten into you?]

[I’m a fan of the original work, and I can confirm this part wasn’t in the original. Lu Yu made it up on the spot.]

[A father forced onto the battlefield by his son has no choice but to perform a quick rap.]

The viewers in the bullet screen were laughing, but the bandit on the scene was completely dumbfounded: “Who are you?”

Lu Yu hoisted his spear onto his shoulder: “I am the commander of this battle. I go by the name Hua Shengmi, and I do not change my name whether sitting or standing! Who are you? State your name!”

The original work didn’t mention the bandit’s real name. Because of his rebellion, he always went by his nickname, “Ground-boring Tiger.” In Lu Dayu’s outline, this person was named Wang Hu.

The bandit was fuming. After being insulted for so long, this guy didn’t even know who he was. Furious, he drew his bow at Lu Yu: “I am Ground-boring Tiger, Lu Tianba!”

Lu Yu stared in shock at the arrow aimed at his chest, but all he could think was: Lu Tianba? 

“Watch out!” Ming Yan’s voice came from within the ranks.

Lu Yu leaned back to dodge the arrow, then sat up, pulled the reins, and rushed straight toward Hua Wenyuan: “Kill him, quickly!”

Hua Wenyuan heard his uncle’s shout and instinctively drew and nocked an arrow. By the time he realized what he was doing, the arrow had already left the string.

The man was standing behind the parapet, and from such a high vantage point, it was hard to hit him. The red-feathered arrow flew through a small arrow slit in the parapet, heading straight for the bandit’s neck. Ground-boring Tiger immediately turned to dodge, and the arrow didn’t even graze him, but it did break the flagpole behind him. The banner, painted with a tiger’s head, fell to the ground. The bandits didn’t understand the seriousness of a fallen banner in warfare, and they laughed heartily, “It’s nothing bu—”

Before he could finish speaking, the second arrow pierced right through his forehead.

Hua Wenyuan had fired two arrows, the first to flush out the enemy, the second to kill him.

After the livestream ended, Lu Yu was furious: “How is there a Lu? Wasn’t this guy supposed to be Wang Hu?”

A crew member, sweating profusely, hurried over, bending down to explain in a low voice: “This character didn’t have a real name in the original, only the nickname ‘Ground-boring Tiger.’ To prevent freezing, we gave every NPC a name, just in case they were suddenly asked. But they were named in bulk, and we might not have paid close attention…”

His voice trailed off as he spoke.

Lu Yu gritted his teeth. Giving such an ugly, doomed cannon-fodder character the boss’s surname—this employee was definitely holding a personal grudge.