SGT CH39: He Was Ashamed to Death
◎Aix was ashamed to death, wishing he could strangle the self who had molested the little male cub.◎
Aix’s body suddenly stiffened.
In his memory, only one Zerg had ever called him that.
—His little male cub.
No, the Prince had also once called out a muffled “brother” in his sleep.
But the Prince was the firstborn son of the Zerg Emperor and the Marshal; he had no older brother.
At that time, who was the Prince calling?
“Big Brother Aix…”
The Prince sobbed, buried in his chest, his actions of clutching his collar exactly the same as the little male cub’s in the memory scene just now.
A guess formed in Aix’s mind.
But Aix didn’t dare to believe it.
Mousse was sobbing uncontrollably.
Everything that had happened before had occurred in his mental domain.
It was his dissipated mental power during his awakening that had pulled Aix’s consciousness into it.
Everything in the mental domain was a Zerg’s truest expression.
Just as Mousse could not pretend in his mental domain and would reveal his truest thoughts, Aix, who had entered his mental domain in a state of pure consciousness, was also unable to pretend.
The words Aix spoke were all true.
At least, they were what he believed to be true.
Mousse’s tears fell ceaselessly.
The tears soaked the collar of Aix’s shirt, to the point that one could even see the red, un-swollen marks underneath, as well as the star-stone ornaments that matched his eye color.
Seeing this, Mousse cried even more sorrowfully.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”
He had never been abandoned.
Aix had left back then to find mental source crystals for him, to make his awakening less painful.
The mental source crystals that filled the entire room were Aix’s obsession and love for the little male cub from the past.
And also his love for the male Zerg who was now constantly hurting and torturing him.
But what had he done?
He had personally destroyed their little home, had watched Aix with cold indifference for many years…
He had personally severed Aix’s wings and locked him in the punishment chamber.
Three months of ignoring him had caused their Zerg egg’s development to stagnate due to lack of pheromones, almost killing their cub.
Afterward, he had even used the cub as a threat, torturing and hurting Aix in every possible way.
Forcing him to kneel, forcing him to open himself up again and again, forcing him into a state of disgrace in the office, forcing him to serve him under the gaze of other Zerg, forcing him to bear his mark on his body, to wear such shameful ornaments…
“Does it hurt a lot?”
Mousse raised his hand, hovering it over the shirt that was soaked semi-transparent by his tears.
He wanted to rub it for Aix, wanted to take off the ornaments.
But he was also afraid that such a touch would bring Aix further pain.
The raised hand ultimately just hovered above the shirt, not daring to move.
“It… it doesn’t hurt.”
Aix subconsciously held the Prince’s raised hand, his mind a bit numb.
“Your Highness, please don’t cry. You… were you affected by my memories?”
Aix frantically wiped the Prince’s tears while cautiously and probingly watching the Prince.
He both wanted to seek an answer and was afraid to get one.
Mousse shook his head, rubbing his tears dry on the collar of Aix’s chest, then looked up to kiss the corner of his mouth.
“Big Brother Aix, I thought you didn’t want me anymore. All these years, I’ve been hating you and thinking of you… Sisi missed you so much.”
Aix’s body was all too familiar with the Prince’s touch.
So, when the Prince came to kiss the corner of his mouth, he subconsciously opened his mouth and welcomed the Prince in.
Then, he heard the Prince’s subsequent words.
—Sisi missed you so much.
Aix’s brain exploded with a “boom.”
Mousse was still kissing him, freely expressing his longing and closeness.
They had missed so, so much during their years of separation.
And the harm he had done to Aix also needed to be healed with more love.
The two Zerg had different living environments and completely different perspectives on matters.
Aix, born in the Dark Star Field, was more accustomed to the law of the jungle.
An eye for an eye, blood for blood, a life for a life.
When he sensed he was in debt, Aix would choose to self-harm and endure harm to let the one he owed vent their anger.
He had hurt the Prince’s heart, so he tore out his own.
He even offered his own life.
Mousse, on the other hand, had been doted on by his parents since he was young. Although he had been through the Dark Star Field, he had never lacked love.
Even in the Dark Star Field, he had had X’s love.
In dealing with debt, he chose to heal and compensate with love.
Mousse, with teary eyes, cried and kissed, earnest and passionate.
Soon, he discovered that the more passionate he was, the stiffer Aix’s body became.
It was as if he had lost the ability to breathe, and even his face flushed with a crimson hue.
His body was burning hot, as if his entire being was on fire.
His back arched, struggling to retreat with an almost imperceptible force.
Mousse had never received such treatment from Aix.
Even when he had hurt Aix the most, Aix would still obediently accommodate and cooperate with him.
“You don’t love me anymore.”
Mousse felt sad.
Actually, thinking about it from the other’s perspective, if it had been Aix who had disappeared without a word for over a decade and then bullied him upon their reunion, he would also be angry with Aix.
He understood the logic. It was right for Aix to be angry with him.
But when Aix showed resistance to his intimacy, Mousse was still very sad.
Yes, Aix was resisting his intimacy.
Even though Aix’s hand holding him had never let go, Mousse could sense it from the stiffness of his body and the almost imperceptible force of his retreat.
Aix’s mouth opened in astonishment, and it took him a long while to find his voice.
“How could I not love you?”
Aix’s lips moved slightly, his gaze heavy, empty, yet flickering.
Whether it was the little male cub or His Highness the Prince, they were both male Zerg he deeply loved.
But if… the little male cub and the Prince were the same Zerg?
Just the thought of this possibility made Aix’s brain shut down.
He once again lost the ability to think.
The sub-female doctor pushed the door open and came in at that moment.
“Congratulations, Your Highness, on your mental power ascending to S+. How is Your Highness feeling now?”
Seeing the two Zerg embracing on the medical bed, the sub-female doctor silently fell quiet.
“Then I’ll just… go out?”
Aix called out to him, got up from the bed, and said to the doctor:
“Please trouble yourself to check His Highness’s body.”
The Prince’s previous mental power awakening had not gone smoothly, and he had just had a big cry upon waking up. Aix was a little worried about the Prince’s physical condition.
The doctor looked at the Prince.
The Prince sat on the medical bed, looking listless, in a state of low spirits.
The Lieutenant General stood by the bed, his hand protectively hovering over the Prince, the worry in his eyes impossible to hide.
It did seem like a check-up was needed.
This was not a reaction one should have after awakening to S+.
That was S+!
Not to mention whether it was possible to continue breaking through to SS, just being at the peak of S-class, only two male Zerg in the entire Zerg race had reached this level.
One was His Majesty the Zerg Emperor, and the other was His Highness the Prince.
The sub-female doctor approached with sublime reverence.
Then… he navigated around the mental source crystals scattered all over the floor as if clearing a minefield.
Deeply shocked by Lieutenant General Aix’s grand gesture, the doctor couldn’t help but say:
“Generally speaking, one source crystal of the same level is enough to soothe a male Zerg’s spirit. These… are a bit too much.”
The effect had completely overflowed.
“I understand,” Aix replied in a low voice.
After leaving the Dark Star Field, Aix had searched for a lot of information related to a male Zerg’s awakening.
He knew this knowledge better than anyone.
It was just that seeing the Prince in discomfort, not waking up for a long time, and thinking of the pained little male cub from back then, he couldn’t care about anything else.
He had laid out all the source crystals he had collected from hunting beasts over the years.
At that time, he had only been thinking that the little male cub had already left him because of his physiological awakening.
The little male cub would never be able to use these source crystals.
He absolutely could not let anything happen to the Prince, to the last male Zerg in this world that he cared about.
Who could have thought that, by a strange twist of fate, these source crystals would actually be used on his little male cub?
If the effect overflowed, so be it, as long as the male Zerg beside him could feel a little better.
The sub-female doctor performed a basic check-up on the Prince and came to a conclusion:
“His Highness’s body is very healthy, and his mental power is also very abundant. It’s just that his emotions have fluctuated too much. Right now… he’s emotionally low and depressed.”
Why would he be emotionally low after his mental power ascended to S+?
The sub-female doctor expressed his confusion.
“I’m fine.”
Mousse got out of bed. As his feet touched the cold floor, he realized this was the medical room, without the plush carpet he was used to.
Just as he felt the cold, his feet were immediately lifted.
Mousse looked down and saw Aix half-squatting in front of him, putting on his shoes for him.
Mousse’s nose suddenly felt a little sour.
He was not a fragile Zerg, but when it came to matters related to Aix, he always couldn’t control his tears.
“Weren’t you ignoring me?” Mousse asked sullenly, his eyes red.
Aix didn’t know how the Prince could have come to such a misunderstanding.
Before, the Prince had said he didn’t love him anymore.
“As long as you still need me, I will always be here.”
Aix finished putting on the Prince’s shoes, then looked up at the Prince, his gaze focused, as if his eyes could only hold him, one Zerg.
With just a simple gaze, Mousse was suddenly soothed.
Only a little bit of petulance remained.
“You said you were always looking for me. Now I’m right in front of you, yet you have no reaction at all.”
Aix’s lips moved slightly, but he didn’t know how to explain.
It wasn’t that he had no reaction; it was that he didn’t know how to react.
When he had just found out that the Prince was his Sisi, the Prince had already kissed him, and he had even responded instinctively.
Before the joy of recovering what was lost could even rise, Aix was completely bewildered by the chaotic relationship.
He belonged to the Prince. The Prince was his Male Master, the male father of his cub. Of course, he could use his body to please the Prince.
But, Sisi was…
How could he… with Sisi…
Aix was in utter chaos, ashamed to death.
He wished he could strangle the self who had molested the little male cub.
It wasn’t until the sub-female doctor appeared that he managed to sober up from the chaos.
But at the same time, he also remembered other things.
He had severely injured the Prince.
Right after the Prince’s physiological awakening had ended, he had pierced the Prince’s chest.
He… had pierced his Sisi’s chest.
Aix was in so much pain he couldn’t breathe.
He wanted to crush his own heart, wanted to break his own bones one by one, wanted to empty all the blood from his body…
He wanted to endure the most extreme pain, to die in the most tragic way, to appease his Sisi.
But the Prince had forbidden him from doing so.
He had stripped him of the right to harm himself.
“Your Highness, I… am very happy, very happy that my Sisi is still alive in this world, and living well…”
The only bad thing was meeting him.
Aix’s eyes were bloodshot, his half-squatting body swaying precariously.
He was the most outstanding military female. The harshest battlefields had not made him fall, the cruelest injuries had not made him submit.
But now, he had broken.
A collapse starting from the spirit, from the inside out.
It was more severe than when he discovered he had hurt the Prince due to a misunderstanding.
The one he had hurt was not only his beloved male Zerg, but also the little male cub he had raised with his own hands and treasured.
Mousse was very familiar with the expression on Aix’s face.
It was a strong self-destructive tendency.
He had seen such an expression many times.
In the years after he had just returned from the Dark Star Field, every time he stood in front of a mirror.
The current Aix was just like him back then.
It was just that back then, he had managed to hold on with a single obsession.
But Aix, he looked like he couldn’t hold on.
They had gone through so many misunderstandings and hurts and had finally reached this point. Mousse would absolutely not accept Aix’s departure.
Even if he couldn’t hold on, he had to hold on for him.
Aix had promised him that he would stay with him for a lifetime.
To accompany him for a lifetime.
Mousse leaned down and embraced the swaying female Zerg, stroking his back from top to bottom, his voice gentle but firm:
“Breathe, Aix, breathe… You won’t abandon Sisi, right?”
Mousse gently nuzzled Aix’s cheek.
Seeing a faint struggle in his lifeless eyes, but his body showing no reaction, Mousse’s voice gradually became harsh:
“If you dare to abandon me, I will definitely chase after you to take revenge. If you leave me today, tomorrow will be a state funeral.”
In the Zerg Empire, the status of the crown prince was extremely important.
If the crown prince died, it would be a state funeral.
“Your Highness?!”
Aix broke free from his strong self-destructive consciousness, grabbed the Prince’s arm, and looked at the Prince with panicked and disbelieving eyes.
He couldn’t believe he would say such a thing.
Mousse kissed his lips as a form of comfort, but the words he spoke could make a Zerg pass out from anger.
“I mean what I say.”
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