GBROTAH CH51

Perhaps it was the weather, or perhaps the environment, but walking into the nursing home felt desolate. The dwindling vitality of the elderly, like the withered yellow leaves in the courtyard, weighed heavily on the heart.

Stepping on the decaying fallen leaves, a soft crunch echoed underfoot as the group followed the community workers, listening to the day’s schedule.

Shi Tingting quietly spoke, “Sigh, have you ever thought about what your life will be like when you’re old? Will it be like this?”

Xie Yuanxing looked towards the nearby dining hall, where a group of elderly people were eating breakfast. They watched them, and the elderly watched them back. “Perhaps.”

Shi Tingting noticed that Shen Bianye’s gaze was fixed on Xie Yuanxing, so she also asked, “What about Senior Shen? Senior Shen is so rich; he surely won’t have to live in a nursing home when he’s old, right?”

Shen Bianye came back to himself and casually, jokingly, said, “Not only will I not have to live in a nursing home, I won’t get old at all.”

Shi Tingting awkwardly chuckled in response, shaking her head. “Senior Shen, wake up. Being rich and being immortal are two different things.”

Shen Bianye seemed to smile, saying nothing. Only those who can live on have the right to think about what life will be like when they’re old. He genuinely hadn’t thought about how he would spend his old age.

What about Xie Yuanxing?

He suddenly asked, “What do you imagine your old age will be like?”

Shi Tingting seemed to have been waiting for this counter-question for a long time. Like a sparrow, she chirped out a ढेर of thoughts: “I want a small courtyard with trees in it. I’ll plant some flowers, water them when I have nothing to do, then lie on a lounge chair under the trees and bask in the sun.”

“Ideally, I’d also have a dog or a cat, and then play cards and drink tea with my old best friends.”

Shen Bianye nodded indifferently. “What about Xie Yuanxing?”

Shi Tingting also unconsciously followed up, “What about Xingxing? Xingxing, tell us.”

Xie Yuanxing thought for a moment, his mind blank. He couldn’t think of anything. “The same as you, I guess.”

Shi Tingting: “…Do you have old best friends too, Xingxing? That’s too perfunctory!”

Xie Yuanxing smiled helplessly, “I really haven’t thought about it; it’s too far away.”

In the past, just dealing with the present had already exhausted Xie Yuanxing. He couldn’t envision the future, nor had he ever thought about old age.

Shen Bianye lowered his gaze to him. “Then think about it now.”

No matter what Xie Yuanxing’s hopes were, he could help Xie Yuanxing achieve them.

Shi Tingting enthusiastically helped Xie Yuanxing envision: “Don’t you want a small courtyard with flowers, Xingxing, or a sea-view house, by the sea, feeling the sea breeze, taking a leisurely stroll?”

Xie Yuanxing frowned, puzzled: “Living by the sea when you’re old, wouldn’t you get rheumatism?”

From a pragmatic perspective, he sounded like a romantic terminator, killing Shi Tingting’s mood.

Shi Tingting punched the air, pretending to be angry: “Xingxing, you’re not romantic at all!”

Shen Bianye chuckled beside them, stifling a laugh as he spoke up for Xie Yuanxing, “He’s not wrong. Living by the sea when you’re old isn’t good.”

Shi Tingting snorted, “You two, an Alpha and a Beta, what do you know about romance?”

“Walking hand in hand with your loved one by the sea when you’re old, feeling the sea breeze, watching your loved one’s hair blown by the wind, how ro-MAN-tic!”

Shen Bianye frowned imperceptibly, unable to imagine Xie Yuanxing walking hand in hand with some blurry-faced person.

If that was Xie Yuanxing’s expectation, then he would probably find it very difficult to fulfill it for Xie Yuanxing.

If he bought Xie Yuanxing a sea-view house, it would be fine for Xie Yuanxing to live there, but why should he let anyone else live there?

Perhaps he could help Xie Yuanxing buy another house, one not by the sea, where there would be no hand-in-hand walks by the shore.

Besides, given Xie Yuanxing’s personality, he probably wouldn’t feel comfortable selling the things X gave him. How long would it take him to achieve the dream of buying a big house, as he told X?

Xie Yuanxing also imagined it, shaking his head: “I won’t look good when I’m old.”

“No, you’ll still look good when you’re old.”

Almost the moment Xie Yuanxing finished speaking, Shen Bianye, still frowning in annoyance and deep in thought, immediately followed with that sentence, so fast it seemed like an instinct, or an involuntary utterance of his inner thoughts.

Xie Yuanxing was stunned, and Shen Bianye was also stunned.

Shi Tingting was completely oblivious, happily chiming in, “Right, right, life’s good now. Some celebrities in their fifties still look very photogenic.”

“Xingxing will still be handsome when he’s old. Xingxing’s bone structure and skin are here; he won’t be ugly!”

“I’ll be handsome when I’m old too, right, Senior Shen?”

Shen Bianye was distracted. Hearing his name, he casually hummed a response, “Mmm.”

Had he just praised Xie Yuanxing?

Did it count?

It should, right?

Shen Bianye’s gaze drifted towards Xie Yuanxing, looking at Xie Yuanxing’s expressionless face, at his naturally closed lips, with no intention of speaking.

He then uncertainly wondered if it counted as a compliment.

Even though he hadn’t thought at all when he said it, wasn’t this more sincere than X’s half-hearted compliments?

Why didn’t Xie Yuanxing react?

Xie Yuanxing always had a very cute reaction every time X praised him.

His heart felt as if an invisible hand had reached in and squeezed it, making Shen Bianye uncomfortable. His thin lips almost formed a straight line, and he didn’t speak again for the rest of the journey.

Upon entering the nursing home, everyone began working, some moving things, others cleaning.

“You’re not wiping it right; you missed that corner there. Look, look!”

“Isn’t there still dust here?”

“That cup, move the cup. Aren’t you going to wipe underneath it?”

The Alpha assigned to wipe dust with Xie Yuanxing held a rag and gestured beside him. When Xie Yuanxing looked over, he extended his hand and pretended to wipe twice.

“You’re quite efficient at this. Betas, no matter what, are more meticulous than Alphas. I’ve never done this at home. If it weren’t for the practical points, I really wouldn’t want to do it.”

Xie Yuanxing glanced at him. “If you talk less, you can also be meticulous.”

The Alpha laughed: “I am doing it. How am I not doing it? Isn’t this wiping?”

“Alphas aren’t suited for these tasks anyway. It’s normal for me to be a bit slow.”

Xie Yuanxing lowered his head, wiping the bedside table, and said blandly, “Did I say you weren’t doing it?”

Shen Bianye, who was also working nearby, frowned, thinking Xie Yuanxing’s words were completely unaggressive. Just as he was about to speak, he heard Xie Yuanxing continue: “Being an Alpha isn’t an excuse not to work. Being disabled is.”

Xie Yuanxing asked seriously: “Are you disabled?”

The Alpha choked, then became somewhat annoyed. It wasn’t the first or second time he had slacked off in a group. Most people weren’t comfortable being so blunt. Suddenly being seriously mocked like this, his first reaction wasn’t embarrassment but dissatisfaction.

“What do you mean by that?”

“Can’t you see I’ve been working the whole time?”

Xie Yuanxing looked over, his tone serious: “Wiping your own hands very clean, truly impressive.”

Pfft.

Someone beside him chuckled. Shen Bianye also had a smile on his lips. Before the Alpha, mortified, could walk over, Shen Bianye stood behind Xie Yuanxing.

The other person paused, then turned away dejectedly and pretended to wipe the window again.

Xie Yuanxing didn’t notice anyone behind him and almost bumped into Shen Bianye when he turned around, his dark eyes wide open, like a startled, adorable cat.

Shen Bianye looked at him and asked, “Where are you going?”

Xie Yuanxing silently held up the cloth in his hand. “To wash the rags.”

Shen Bianye looked at his slightly reddened fingertips and said without much hesitation, “I’ll go. The water’s cold in winter.”

As he spoke, he reached out to take the cloth from Xie Yuanxing’s hand. Xie Yuanxing avoided him, but Shen Bianye extended his long arm and took the cloth.

“You sweep; I’ll do this.”

Eyes around them, both overt and subtle, were all on Xie Yuanxing. Xie Yuanxing felt a little uncomfortable, whispered a “thank you,” and turned to pick up the tools.

He didn’t know what Shen Bianye wanted to do, but he was tired of dealing with it and didn’t want to repeatedly become the focus of attention. After finishing the sweeping, he turned and went outside to help.

The nursing home wasn’t large, and with lunch approaching, it became difficult to avoid anyone.

Xie Yuanxing didn’t know what Shen Bianye did after he left. When it was time for lunch, that Alpha was already trailing behind Shen Bianye like a sycophant.

Shen Bianye sat next to Xie Yuanxing, and the Alpha sat further down, leaning forward to say to Xie Yuanxing, “I’m sorry, classmate. What happened this morning was my fault. But don’t worry, Senior Shen and I cleaned up the rest.”

Xie Yuanxing looked at the abrasion on his temple, shaking his head in silence.

Shi Tingting, who hadn’t been working with them that morning, looked confused.

Xie Yuanxing pursed his lips and said, “Let’s eat.”

Shen Bianye: “Were you tired this morning? You can rest for a while this afternoon. I originally wanted to get you a milk tea, but this place is a bit far, so they don’t deliver.”

Xie Yuanxing, under the bright gaze of Shi Tingting across the table, felt a little pressure and shook his head, refusing: “No need, thank you.”

“Those who have finished eating, come with me. We’re going to set up the venue for the afternoon activity.”

Someone at the dining hall entrance was waving. Xie Yuanxing, with almost no hesitation, got up and left.

The stage was simply hung with a banner, and a few simple balloons were stuck on as decorations. The tables in the activity hall were wiped spotless and set with tea, pastries, and small snacks.

Once everything was set up, Xie Yuanxing stood in a corner, wearing his red vest, watching the elderly, whose spirits were much better than in the morning, walk in.

They seemed to come alive with the arrival of the young students. The enthusiastic and cheerful students surrounded them, chatting and laughing. Shi Tingting scurried onto the makeshift stage and delivered a simple opening speech:

“Dear teachers, students, and respected grandpas and grandmas, good afternoon everyone!”

Xie Yuanxing unconsciously smiled. A faint voice beside him said, “You smile when you see her. Do you like her very much?”

When Shen Bianye said this, he himself felt inexplicable. He was about to say something else to cover it up, but then he saw the smile that had been on Xie Yuanxing’s face fade when he saw him.

If the rule “seeing them makes you smile means you like them very much” applied.

Then, not smiling when seeing him, just how much did Xie Yuanxing dislike him?

Shen Bianye twisted his brow. He considered that he hadn’t done anything particularly hateful to Xie Yuanxing. Why was Xie Yuanxing reacting like this?

Xie Yuanxing didn’t know when Shen Bianye had stood beside him. The sudden sound startled him, and Shen Bianye following him everywhere made Xie Yuanxing feel like he was being haunted by some persistent male ghost.

He didn’t even reply to Shen Bianye. Seeing only one empty seat left at the front table, he walked over and sat down.

He couldn’t afford to provoke, but he could afford to hide.

The old woman next to him saw him sit down and pulled him to talk. The old woman was a bit strange; her words were somewhat disjointed. One moment she was talking about the performance, the next she started talking about the pot at home.

Xie Yuanxing had no experience interacting with the elderly, but he still patiently responded to each of her remarks.

A passing nursing home staff member saw this and reminded him, “This elderly person has Alzheimer’s. If she talks about the stove not being turned off at home or something, just go along with it and say it’s already off.”

Xie Yuanxing nodded. “Okay.”

The old woman next to him was displeased. “What Alzheimer’s? I don’t have that. Always this disease and that disease. I think you’re all trying to harm me.”

With that, she suddenly slapped the table, making a loud thudding sound.

Xie Yuanxing quickly comforted her, holding her hand and softly saying, “No one is trying to harm you, Grandma. Shall we watch the performance?”

The old woman nodded: “Good, good, my dear grandson is good.”

“Watch the performance, everyone watch the performance.”

Seeing her quiet down, Xie Yuanxing also sat up straight and looked up at the stage in front. As he looked up, the old woman beside him shakily held out a red bean paste cake to him, “Eat, my good grandson, eat this.”

He instinctively turned around to look, and his arm bumped into the offered red bean paste cake. The elderly person didn’t hold it steadily, and a plate of red bean paste cakes spilled completely.

The old woman immediately panicked. The white-haired person hung her head, like a child who had made a mistake, her body trembling faintly, mumbling repeatedly: “Good grandson doesn’t eat, good grandson don’t be angry, the fire at home is off, good grandson eat, you eat, it’s all my fault, it’s gone…”

Xie Yuanxing’s heart twisted. He bent down to pick up the more intact red bean paste cakes on the ground.

His phone slipped out of his pocket with his movement and fell to the ground with a thud. Xie Yuanxing ignored his phone, ate the relatively intact red bean paste cake in his hand, and comforted the old woman, “I’m not angry, Grandma, don’t worry.”

“Look, I ate it all.”

Shen Bianye, from a distance, frowned and quickly walked over. Shi Tingting, who had just finished her intro on stage, also came down and quickly said, “There’s more, don’t worry, Grandma, I’ll go get more.”

“Xingxing, come with me to get it.”

With that, she quickly pulled Xie Yuanxing away, fearing that he would pick up things from the ground to eat again to comfort the old woman.

It wasn’t until they reached the small room where the pastries were stored that she spoke: “Xingxing, are you silly? I interacted with that old woman this morning. She has a bit of Alzheimer’s. She’ll forget what just happened in a while. Why did you pick up things from the ground to eat?”

Xie Yuanxing felt a slight shortness of breath in his chest, and his voice was very low: “She was trembling. She might have been hit by her family before. I recognize that kind of reaction.”

“I didn’t think much of it. I just didn’t want her to be so scared.”

Shi Tingting was stunned, stammering, “Even so, you shouldn’t pick up things from the ground. How dirty is that?”

Xie Yuanxing shook his head, “It’s fine.”

He saw that Shi Tingting’s mood had also plummeted because of his words, and after thinking for a moment, he said, “I’ve even eaten rice mixed with cigarette ash. This is much cleaner than that.”

Shi Tingting: “Huh?”

Xie Yuanxing smiled: “Just kidding.”

Shi Tingting punched the air, laughing wryly, “You scared me!”

“Oh, by the way, your phone fell just now. Did it break? Hey, wait, did I pull you away too fast before you could pick it up?”

Xie Yuanxing suddenly remembered. Just as he was about to go back to look for it, Shen Bianye walked in through the doorway and handed him his phone. “It’s cracked. See if it can still turn on?”

Xie Yuanxing paused, then reached out and took it.

He wasn’t sure if Shen Bianye had heard what he just said. Shi Tingting would believe he was joking, but Shen Bianye wouldn’t.

Xie Yuanxing felt annoyed, thinking he shouldn’t have said anything.

He was terrible at lightening the mood, and he couldn’t think of anything better to say at the moment.

Seeing the phone full of cracks, Xie Yuanxing panicked for a moment. He reached out to press the power button, and when it didn’t respond, he became completely flustered. He frantically pressed the side buttons several times, and when that didn’t work, he long-pressed it again, repeating this several times, his mood plummeting to rock bottom.

Shi Tingting leaned over: “Is it broken?”

Xie Yuanxing hummed: “Seems so.”

He took a deep breath, suppressing the panic in his heart, and asked directly, “Can I leave now? I want to find a place to fix my phone.”

Shi Tingting was a bit embarrassed: “Not yet. We haven’t taken the big group photo at the end. Since you’re not in the student union, if you’re not in the photo, it’ll be hard to get the extra points.”

“Besides, the bus here is very slow. Why don’t you wait until we get back to school to fix it? It’s the weekend anyway; you don’t need your phone for anything.”

Xie Yuanxing gripped his phone, saying nothing. Shen Bianye walked over and said, “I’ll go.”

“I wasn’t really part of this activity anyway, so it’s fine if I leave early.”

Xie Yuanxing handed him the phone, quietly saying, “Thank you.”

Until the nursing home activity ended, Xie Yuanxing took the bus back with the main group, and Shen Bianye hadn’t returned.

Xie Yuanxing was a bit tired. He declined Shi Tingting’s invitation to go for a big dinner, which someone was sponsoring. When he arrived at school, he went straight back to his dorm.

He sat blankly for a while, wanting to message Shen Bianye, only to remember he didn’t have his phone.

When the dorm door opened, Xie Yuanxing stood up immediately, his eyes shining with a rare brightness as he looked at Shen Bianye, “Is it fixed?”

A silver phone was handed to Xie Yuanxing. Shen Bianye shook his head. “Your phone was too old. I bought you a new one and already took your SIM card out and put it in this one.”

Xie Yuanxing: “I don’t want this one. Where’s my phone? Give it to me.”

“I don’t want this. I want my old one.”

“Give it back.”

Shen Bianye frowned: “What’s wrong? Don’t you like this one?”

Xie Yuanxing looked at the brand-new phone in front of him. He knew the brand; he had bought the same series for Xie Zhuowu a year ago. He knew it was expensive and probably had good features.

But Xie Yuanxing still froze for a moment, as if he didn’t recognize what it was, or as if he couldn’t react: “You gave me this. Where’s my phone?”

Shen Bianye hesitated. “It was too old, and it was already broken.”

Xie Yuanxing thought of a possibility and asked blankly: “So, you just threw it away?”

“You saw my phone was old and broken, and wanted to get me a new one to mend our relationship, but you were afraid I wouldn’t accept it, so you presumptuously threw it away?”

Shen Bianye nodded, honestly stating: “Yes.”

He paused, then emphasized: “But I’m only giving you a phone to mend a normal roommate relationship.”

When Xie Yuanxing dropped his phone, he was anxious, but his emotions were still normal. Shen Bianye wasn’t sure if it was because the phone broke or something else.

So, even if the phone repair shop owner said it couldn’t be fixed and there were no replaceable motherboards on the market, he still found someone to send it elsewhere to try. That’s why he came back so late.

But there was no certainty about it, most likely it couldn’t be fixed, so there was no need to mention it.

Besides, giving a new phone was nothing.

Because he couldn’t tell if Xie Yuanxing was anxious, he went to great lengths, searching everywhere for someone to fix Xie Yuanxing’s phone, which he’d had for an unknown number of years, not even knowing if it could be done. That would make it seem like he cared too much about Xie Yuanxing.

It went beyond the scope of mending a roommate relationship, so he certainly couldn’t mention it.

Xie Yuanxing, however, stood frozen, the emotions that had been building since seeing the trembling old woman suddenly surging, suffocating him.

Without warning, a drop of water fell onto the phone screen.

Shen Bianye visibly panicked, reaching out as if to wipe it, then withdrawing his hand. “Why are you crying?”

“Don’t like the style? Or the color?”

Xie Yuanxing lowered his head, his dark bangs obscuring his eyes, making his expression unreadable. Only his low voice could be heard: “My phone, did you really take it to be fixed?”

Shen Bianye, flustered, tried to explain: “I took it to be fixed, but…”

But?

Xie Yuanxing interrupted him, “But if it couldn’t be fixed, you could just throw it away?”

Shen Bianye opened his mouth, about to speak, but was abruptly cut off by Xie Yuanxing again.

Xie Yuanxing suddenly looked up, his emotions fluctuating violently, his eyes red-rimmed, sharply questioning word by word: “Even if it can’t be fixed, I want it here with me. How dare you throw it away?”

His chest heaved violently, his eyes like they were crying yet also holding a ball of fire, filled with immense anger: “That’s my stuff, not yours.”

“How dare you make decisions for me?”

His heart held so much, emotions accumulated for too long, needing an outlet.

Xie Yuanxing murmured, suddenly deflating, his face pale as he repeated: “How dare you make decisions for me?”

His fingers clenched, his emotions suddenly plummeted, as if he was very tired, exhausted.

“That was a gift my mom prepared for me when I started junior high school. It even has a recording of her voice inside. I shouldn’t have been so careless and broken the phone. It’s my fault. Can you give it back to me?”

His tears fell instantly. He had felt very uncomfortable and scared since seeing the trembling old woman.

When his phone broke, his heart suddenly leaped, and now it plummeted, sinking so deep that Xie Yuanxing’s emotions seemed like stagnant water.

Shen Bianye was completely flustered. “Wait, don’t cry yet, I didn’t throw it away, I took it to be fixed, baby, I took it to be fixed.”

“Is it fun to lie to me?”

Xie Yuanxing didn’t believe him. His eyelashes trembled, and wet tears streamed down. He seemed to be struggling to breathe, asking painfully, “I already have so little. Why did you presumptuously throw away another one of my possessions?”

“Since the semester began, you’ve suddenly been very hostile towards me, looking down on me, humiliating me.”

Shen Bianye felt a wave of panic, as if something was slipping from his grasp. He spoke urgently: “At first, I was wrong, but later I didn’t humiliate you anymore.”

Xie Yuanxing paused, as if he had heard a very funny joke. He did indeed laugh, very softly, with a hint of bitterness: “Perhaps what you said later wasn’t harsh.”

“But did I have to listen? Did I have to endure it?”

He looked at Shen Bianye, his eyes sad and tired, as if asking Shen Bianye, and also asking himself, deeply: “What did I do wrong again?”

Was it really as Xie Zhuowu said, that he was too pampered when he was little?

Then he changed, he dared not have any temper again, but what he got in return was everyone seeming to be able to bully him.

Xie Yuanxing’s throat ached. Tears streamed down his face, his voice barely audible: “I’m really fragile. Can you please stop scolding me?”

Those were the words he wanted to say every single time, every time under Shen Bianye’s disdainful taunts.

Some words might not be harsh, more like teasing, but he was petty, sensitive, gloomy, and had been scolded for many years. Was it wrong not to want to hear it anymore?

Shen Bianye’s heart was in great pain. The amusement he felt when he saw Xie Yuanxing’s vengeful notebook was like a belated sharp blade, plunging straight into his throat, tearing his flesh. When he spoke, he could only manage a weak, “Don’t cry. I won’t do it again, okay?”

Tears blurred Xie Yuanxing’s eyes. He looked at the silent and quiet person in front of him, feeling that Shen Bianye also seemed close to tears.

Ha, he was very powerful too, he could make Shen Bianye cry with him.

Xie Yuanxing twitched the corner of his mouth, unable to smile, “You want to mend our relationship, so you can pretend those past words never existed, because you weren’t the one being scolded, and you weren’t the one being humiliated.”

Shen Bianye was as if nailed in place, completely stiff. Xie Yuanxing spoke to him relatively calmly, yet every word seemed like a nail, firmly piercing into his bones and flesh, sentencing him with each sentence.

He didn’t know whether to continue explaining about the phone or about his words. Xie Yuanxing had never said anything, and he had never thought that those words would hurt Xie Yuanxing so much.

No, that’s not right, Xie Yuanxing had mentioned it once before—the words “seductive,” “inferior,” “pretending to be an Omega”—he never said those again. But afterwards, what he thought were light words were still sharp blades to Xie Yuanxing.

Initially, Shen Bianye looked down on Xie Yuanxing’s gloomy and silent demeanor, which made him want to help Xie Yuanxing, to make him like a normal, healthy mushroom.

But now…

Shen Bianye thought with a bitter smile, he seemed to have become the one suppressing Xie Yuanxing.

He wanted to explain, but the words reached his lips, then seemed to be blocked by a surge of air, his throat scraped painfully, preventing him from uttering such pale excuses.

The dorm was quiet, so quiet it felt suffocating.

Shen Bianye forced a smile, opening his mouth to apologize.

“I’m sorry, I broke my phone, I shouldn’t have gotten angry with you,” Xie Yuanxing said, lowering his head first. His thin back seemed unable to support his body, making his turning motion unusually slow.

Like a mushroom hit by frost, he shrank into a corner, wanting to heal his wounds in the darkness.

“Can you leave first?”

“I have nowhere to go, so could you please leave first?”

The door closed softly. Shen Bianye looked at the door, standing silently for a while. He was tall, with a straight back, almost touching the doorframe where he stood.

But at this moment, as he silently gazed at the door, he looked like a dying tree, devoid of life.

If there was still a chance to fix the phone, would Xie Yuanxing be willing to give him a chance to mend their relationship?

Although their problems might not stem from a single phone, this was also why Shen Bianye hadn’t brought up the phone that he didn’t know if he could fix.